Thursday, January 31, 2013

Dulu Barua, Kini Barua dan Sampai Pejam Mata Barua

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Sumpah! Saya bukan seorang balaci, 
saya barua.

Bapak sapa ni? Terkini dia mencari-cari [pencuci] untuk daftar pemilihnya yg dikatakan terkini, terseksi dan terbersih seantero dunia. Kesian kat anak cucu. Sebenarnya anak cucu tak mintak dilahirkan berdarah barua. Apakan daya. Lambat cabut.

Tapi, mungkin jugak anak cucu bangga datuk nenek seorang barua. Mana tau, kan?

Barua ini hina amat. Pakailah title apa pun. Baik Tan Sri, Datuk Sri, Tun dsb. Kalau dah barua, dia punya batuk pun berbunyi, "barua koh, koh, koh, koh barua, barua!"

Barua ialah species yg lebih hina dari pacal yg hina. Tau makna pacal?

Pacal ialah anak anjing, mengikut bahasa Melayu lama.

Kalau bapak anjing pun takut dan mengikut kata tuan, inikan pulak anak anjing.


Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Cuba Berak Di Ruang Tamu Rumah Mustapa Mohamad

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Menteri kata loji Lynas selamat kerana pelabur tak bimbang

Menteri Perdagangan Antarabangsa dan Industri Datuk Seri Mustapa Mohamed berkata kesediaan pelabur China untuk melabur di taman industri yang terletak hampir dengan loji Lynas di Gebeng, Kuantan menunjukkan bahawa kilang pemprosesan nadir bumi itu "selamat dan bukan satu isu".



Bercakap dalam satu sidang media hari ini, Mustapa berkata pelabur maklum mengenai kedudukan Malaysia-China Kuantan Industrial Park (MCKIP) itu. [Lagi di Malaysiakini]


Bodo punya Mustapa Mohamad. Harap dahi sahaja luas, tapi penuh langau.

Mustapa Mohamad mengatakan loji Lynas selamat. Maka sebab itulah pelabur dari China datang berbondong-bondong melabur di Gebeng. 

Baik, disebabkan Mustapa ini bodo, kita bagi satu analoji mudah. Analoji berak tengah rumah;

Cuba andaikan pelabur-pelabur ini bertandang ke rumah Mustapa, tapi Mustapa tak ada di rumah. Pelabur-pelabur ini perut semakin memulas akibat terlebih laksam.

Tahan punya tahan, tapi tak boleh tahan. Maka pelabur-pelabur China ini berak di ruang tamu Mustapa. Setelah puas berak beramai-ramai di ruang tamu, langsir mahal-mahal Mustapa jadi kertas jamban, dibuat mencelet ponggong!

Pelabur-pelabur China puas hati, taik berlonggok-longgok semua dah keluar. Mustapa dan anak bini dan jiran tetangga yg akan menanggung bau berbulan-bulan.

Kalau ditanya, mestilah pelabur-pelabur China itu akan kata, 

"Ruang tamu Mustapa tidak mebahaya langsunglah!", "Bersih dan selamat"

"Langsirnya pun first class!"

Kah kah kah! Pelabur-pelabur China itu akan memuji melangit, sebab perut dah lega. Buat taik kat rumah orang dan tak perlu susah-susah cuci. Semua kerja cuci tuan rumah akan buat.

Nampak tak Mustapa Mohamad?

Ustad Nasa Dah Boleh Pakai Sari

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Sokongan yg datang bukan kecik anak, tak lain tak bukan datang dari Chief of chiefs of Kutties. The emperor Mahafiraun himself!

The Mahafirauns welcome you Ustad Nasa.

Ustad kena berlatih cakap kuat-kuat. Tangan kena sama naik tergawang-gawang.

Kena tau buat auta sikit-sikit.

Kalau dah malas pakai serban yg tebal, rimas dan panas, training la pakai sari.

Hujung minggu jangan buang masa, sila pergi belajar Bahasa Tamil.

Awas, jangan berada dekat dgn ular bisa, nanti ustad kena balon dulu! Kah kah kah!

Ambiklah ustad Nasa tu, bela. Bukan ada apa pun dah. Punggung pun dah makin pipih, tulang belakang makin lama makin herot, pakai tali pinggang habis cerut habis lubang. Ambiklah!

Boleh jugak jadi tukang baca doa nak makan dalam majlis. Tak kan nak harapkan Nakhaie sahaja. Sampai bila kan? Kah kah kah!

Nak harapkan Fatol Bari?
Fatol Bari tak ada masa, Fatol Bari tengah sibuk kira bulu roma. Kah kah kah!!!


Dr M: Terpulang jika Nasha mahu tinggalkan PAS
 
PAS perlu melihat penyertaan bekas timbalan presiden parti itu, Nasharuddin Mat Isa ke Gaza sebagai model kerjasama antara kerajaan dan pembangkang sebagaimana harapan melihat kerjasama antara Hamas dan Fatah, kata bekas Perdana Menteri Tun Dr Mahathir Mohamad. 

Sehubungan itu, beliau berkata PAS tidak seharusnya mengutamakan politik sehingga mengambil keputusan memecat Nasarudin, yang juga Anggota Parlimen Bachok, daripada Majlis Syura PAS.[lagi di Malaysiakini]

US high school gives Muslim students prayer time-outs

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Source: Harakahdaily

WASHINGTON, Jan 29: The growing number of Muslim students seeking accommodations to practice their religion in public schools has stirred debate about the long-contentious issue of prayer in America’s public institutions.

But a Prince George’s County high school principal believes she has found a way to accommodate Muslim students: She gives those with parental permission and high grades a pass out of class every day to pray.

At Parkdale High School, about 10 Muslim students get out of class for about eight minutes each day to pray together on campus, said Principal Cheryl J. Logan. Another student is working hard to raise his grades so he too can join the group of students, who belong to the school’s chapter of the Muslim Students’ Association, she said.

When Muslim students began praying during the school day at Parkdale, she said, some Christian teachers got upset and told the students that “it was a Christian school.” She said she explained to the students that public schools are not religious, but are legally allowed to accommodate students to practice their religion in some ways.

“I’ve been real happy with how we’ve been able to deal with it without it becoming an issue,” Logan said.

Making accommodations for Muslim students in public schools is becoming an increasingly big issue around the country.

According to Charles Haynes, director of the Religious Freedom Education Project at the Newseum who writes and speaks on religious liberty and religion in American public life, the accommodations that Logan is providing to the Muslim students are “certainly permissible” under the U.S. Constitution though probably not required.

Religious accommodations in public schools vary depending on state law, he said. Some states have passed laws that allow schools to “simply treat everyone the same way and not give exemptions or special accommodations for religious reasons.”

Asked if Logan would have to accommodate any student who asked for class time off to pray, he said that any school district “would be wise to treat everyone the same way.” Arguing that Islam requires daily prayer as a reason to accommodate Muslims and not other students of other religions is ill advised, he said.

“And that’s one of the problems with accommodation, of course,” he said. “Once you start down that road then you really are in a bind.”

Furthermore, picking and choosing which Muslim students can pray during class time may be allowable under the law, he said, but “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

Last November, the Montgomery County Board of Education told leaders of the county’s growing Muslim community that it would be impossible to add an Islamic holy day to the school calendar. There are Christian and Jewish holidays on the school calendar because it was determined long ago that even if class stayed open on those days there would be too many students and teachers taking the day off anyway to operate viable classrooms.

And in some schools, female teachers and students are not allowed to wear Islamic head scarves, or have been harassed for doing so, according to the American Civil Liberties Association.

Demba Ba

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As a teenager Demba Ba took part in unsuccessful trials at Watford, Barnsley, Swansea City, Lyon and Auxerre, before FC Rouen, in France’s fourth division, finally took a gamble on his services. He spent a season there, scoring 22 goals in 26 games, then joined Mouscron in Belgium’s first tier. After 8 goals in 12 games 1899 Hoffenheim forked out €3m for him and his 12 goals in 30 games helped them gain promotion to the Bundesliga.

In July 2009, when Ba was 24-years-old, he tried to force a move away from 1899 Hoffenheim, the club he had joined two years earlier. VfB Stuttgart, who had just finished the season five points behind champions Wolfsburg, put in an offer for the striker which was rejected.

“For four or five months I have been mulling over leaving the club,” the player told Suddeutsche Zeitung. “Now I have made up my mind on that and I am certain on leaving Hoffenheim 1899. The offer that dropped in from Stuttgart only had a speeding effect on my decision. Hoffenheim told me they would not allow me to leave. But even though I am under contract for two more years at the club, I am absolutely in need of a change of environment right now.”

How Much Longer Giggsy?

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Ryan Giggs has not been tearing teams apart lately but his performance against West Ham in the FA Cup third round replay suggests that he is still capable of rolling back the years and making an effective contribution. It is for performances like this that Sir Alex Ferguson offers him one-year contracts for the last few campaigns. But does it make sense to carry this on for another year?

Giggs had a dreadful start to the season, especially at the heart of midfield at Anfield and against Spurs at home. Following these two matches, he hasn’t featured in the ‘big games’ and probably, rightly so. With increased importance being given to ball possession and retention, a pressing game in the middle will find Giggs punching way above his weight, and failing.

However, recent performances have brought joy to many fans, especially when used as a wide player. Despite lacking pace, playing wide suits him better in the modern game where one tends to find more space in the wide areas and can use the fresh legs to good effect when coming on as a substitute. He is still capable of a good delivery into the box, or of taking out defences with a clever ball akin the pass for Robin Van Persie’s equaliser that earned them the replay against West Ham in the FA Cup. Ferguson is more aware of Giggs’s capabilities and is now using him more sparingly – in cup fixtures and league matches where rotation is essential.

Given Ferguson’s recent comments in the press post the West Ham match, it won’t be surprising if he indeed offers Giggs another one-year contract. The ideal option would be for United to invest in a winger and in midfield so that Giggs still doesn’t have to be relied upon. Post retirement, he can still be part of the coaching team and continue to influence the team with his experience.

For a majority of United fans, Giggs’s achievements and legendary status implies that, in their eyes, he is above all criticism and flak received. However, for an increasing number of fans, he is turning out to be the finished article. Both Ferguson and Giggs need to ensure that the player’s role within the squad is used cleverly in these circumstances such that his legend remains intact and that he is remembered for all the great achievements in years gone by rather than shortcomings on the pitch in the twilight years of his playing career.

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Hikayat Mereng Mahawangsa

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Gambar ini aku dapat di wall Facebook aku. Ngam-ngam sebelum aku off laptop dan pergi masuk tidur.

Ingin aku bertanya seikhlas hati, apa reaksi korang bila tgk gambar ini?

1. aku gelak guling-guling atas lantai, sampai terjaga anak kecik aku.
2. apa la nasib si Najib ini, dah tak ada orang hormat lagi ke kat dia? Mahafiraun awal-awal dulu orang hormat jugak. Najib ini memang tertulis agaknya, tangan dia memang tangan taik. Cuit apa pun jadi taik.
3. Apa kejadahnya Yao Ming termasuk dalam gambar? Kah kah kah!!!

Anwar Ibrahim: Ayah Mahathir Dari Mana?

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Video dicedok dari anwaribrahimblog.com

Cikgu-cikgi Masih Nak Mengundi UMNO?

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Guru Besar kaki palat. 

Sudah lah. Yang sudah, sudah lah. Itu cerita lama. Sampai bila tak sedar-sedar hidung kena cucuk?

Tak sedar-sedar lagi? Masih terhegeh-hegeh nak mengundi UMNO?

Sedarlah cikgu-cikgi, bunyinya kerja 7 pagi - 2 tengahari tapi kenapa pukul 5 petang ketiak dah masam baru nak balik rumah?

Cikgu-cikgi dapat subsidi dakwat printer? Berapa batang marker pen dapat dalam sebulan? Photostat pakai duit sapa? Kertas A4? 

Orang lain pergi opis semua alat tersedia. Pen free, kertas free, dakwat free, laptop free, semua free. Punya haramjadah kadang-kadang minum teh pun free tau? Minum teh 4 kali sehari.

Cikgu-cikgi makan pun tak tentu masa. Orang kerja opis gomen boleh mencekik sampai pukul 3 ptg, cikgu-cikgi kadang-kadang pukul 3 petang belum tentu jumpa nasi.

Tak cukup di sekolah, kerja bawak balik rumah. Tengah malam buta kena bangun buat data entry. Server punya la haramjadah slow.......... Dalam pada itu, sekupang haram Kementerian Pelajaran tak bayar upah kerja lebih masa.

Wei... tengah malam orang lain menenggek atas perut la... Kah kah kah! Nak maen pun tak senang.

Hari Sabtu kena pergi sekolah. Geng-geng PTD pergi makan bakso, makan sate, pergi zoo dgn family pada hari Sabtu tau?

Hari Sabtu cikgu-cikgi pergi sekolah buat kerja tukang kebun. Barua punya Guru Besar.

Dapat Guru Besar dah nak menopaus & bersara lagi macam sial. Tak ada reti malu lagi dah. Boleh kata, depan anak buah menggosok menggilap telor PPD.

Pakatan Rakyat janji nak kasi elaun RM500-00 tak mau? Cikgu-cikgi ni nak mengundi UMNO lagi ke? 

Kalau rasa was-was untuk mengundi Pakatan Rakyat, pergi la masuk bilik & kunci dari dalam. Duduk bersila atas lantai, bongkok slow-slow...

Sendiri kolom lah!

Monday, January 28, 2013

Terbaek Dari Facebook - Teknik Ikat Batu-bata Style UMNO

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Ini upacara ikat bata UMNO. Suku-sakat UMNO amat menitik-bengikkan perkara sebegini. Lagi panjang berjela upacara itu, bertambah afdal ianya.

Majlis ini kompom ada tabur beras kunyit, pulut putih kuning dan ayam jantan panggang yg belum pandai mengawan.

Upacara macam ini ada jampi serapahnya. Sebelah kiri mamat poyo bersonggkok mungkin seorang pawang.

"Wahai mambang batu, mambang kayu, mambang pasir, mambang simen, aku tahu asal usul mu,
dari lembut menjadi keras, dari lembik tegak mencanak, 
fuuuuh kiri fuuuuuh kanan taik babi besar lengan!" 

"Jadilah kau rumah PPRT!"

Kah kah kah

Kompleks Bunga Raya KLIA, Runtuh Semalam

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10,000 berhimpun sambut Najib di KLIA

Lebih 10,000 rakyat berbilang kaum termasuk menteri Kabinet dan orang kenamaan hari ini membanjiri Kompleks Bunga Raya, Lapangan Terbang Antarabangsa Kuala Lumpur (KLIA) bagi menyambut kepulangan Perdana Menteri Datuk Seri Najib Tun Razak.


Kehadiran mereka bagi menunjukkan sokongan kepada Perdana Menteri yang  mengadakan lawatan ke Semenanjung Gaza Selasa lalu sebelum menghadiri mesyuarat tahunan Forum Ekonomi Dunia (WEF) 2013 di Davos, Switzerland. [lagi di MalaysiaKini]


Bayangkanlah! 10 000 guni beras berasak-asak di Kompleks Bunga Raya. Boleh runtuh kompleks!

Bayangkanlah! 5 000 wanita saiz Rosmah, 5 000 jantan saiz Noh Omar

Bercampur gaul, bersesak-sesak, bergesel-gesel bontot dan berasak-asak di kompleks itu untuk menyambut tiba pahlawan Gaza yg baru pulang.

Bayangkanlah 10 000 punya peluh, bau 10 000 orang ini. Ya Allah ya tuhan... mintak simpang malaikat! Kahkahkah!!!

Pergi Gaza ada telur, 
diajak Mat Nuar berbahas, telur ghaib dalam halkum!
Kah kah kah!!!


Sunday, January 27, 2013

Minum Kopi Dan Mengentot

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Majlis Fatwa Kebangsaan masih lagi 'belum kendur' untuk 
mengambil keputusan berhubung isu iklan lucah kopi-kopi
tenaga batin.
Gambar di atas dicedok dari Kulupsakah

Bukan bestlah bangang. Ini bahaya, nak mampus?
Jelas kopi kuat kotei ini hanyalah gimik peniaga. 
Perlulah diketahui, dalam 'yahanu' kita itu cuma ada otot dan salur darah yg berselirat entah berapa puluh ribu jumlahnya.

Kalau nak 'yahanu' itu power, kenalah bersenam. Malas bersenam suka terlentang atas sofa tengok tv macamana 'yahanu' itu sihat dan kuat.

'Yahanu' yg sihat dan kuat ialah 'yahanu' yg tidak ter'blok' salur darahnya. Juga jantung yg kuat untuk mengepam darah terus-menerus ke semua salur darah di dalam 'yahanu' itu seterusnya mengekalkan ke'canak'kannya menongkat kain sarung.

Bukan hirup kopi-kotei-entah-hapa-ke-benda saban pagi, saban malam. Dah la kopi itu mahal, silap haribulan hilang nyawa kat celah kangkang.

Nak jadikan cerita, masuk suratkhabar muka depan, 'si anu mati lemas di celah kangkang bininya'.

Anak-anak jugak dapat malu.

Sedar-sedarlah orang Melayu, orang putih dah naik ke bulan dengan teknologinya. Kita ini umat Melayu tidak habis-habis lagi dgn teknologi naik atas perut bini!

Kah kah kah!

Saturday, January 26, 2013

Terbaek Dari Facebook - Nissan Vanette Iblis

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Apa punya gila. Apa punya bodoh. Apa punya bangsat. Nissan Vanette cecah 930km/j!??

Nissan Vanette nak cecah 180km/j pun menggigil satu body.

Satu kamera AES bukan harga ribu-ribu. Harga ratus ribu. Kalau tak reti adjust kamera AES, jgn adjust. Mengaku la diri bahalol. 

Jgn diusik-usik. Salah usik, meracau bacaannya.

Baru minggu lepas AES mengesan sebuah Hilux 4WD Iblis, minggu ini Nissan Vanette Iblis.



The Silent Riot

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Artikel ini aku baca di loyarburok.com yg mengisahkan sedikit tentang rusuhan kaum yg hampir terjadi di Sabah apabila Pairin Kittingan menang p/raya negeri pada tahun 1985.

Aku tidak tahu-menahu sebesar cacing kerawit pun tentang peristiwa ini dan aku yakin hanya berapa kerat sahaja orang semenanjung yg tahu.

Artikel ini mungkin dapat mengurangkan sedikit kebebalan kita tentang sejarah tanahair.

Penulis artikel ini ialah Justin Sunam Wong anak jati Sabah dan banyak artikelnya diterbitkan di loyarburok.com.

A vital and seldom revealed part of Malaysian history we all need to know about.

The first bomb exploded in Kota Kinabalu on 25 May 1985. It happened just outside the hotel Lim Kit Siang was staying in during his time in Sabah. Parti Bersatu Sabah (PBS) had just won the election on 21 April 1985. Weeks before that, Dr Mahathir famously declared that Barisan Nasional (BN) would ‘Sink or Swim” with Parti Bersatu Rakayat Jelata Sabah (BERJAYA).


No one could have predicted that PBS would actually succeed in wrestling the state government from BERJAYA. PBS was an upstart while BERJAYA had the backing of the almighty BN, with its extensive and well-oiled machinery. I remember – in the run up to the poll – the media were relentless in their attack against PBS and its president, the then Datuk Joseph Pairin Kitingan. Whether it was based on founded allegations or not, the fear that went circulating in town was whether our constituency would end up like Tambunan, which was deprived of development (because of their continued support for Datuk Pairin) should the rakyat here support PBS. The frustration against BERJAYA was boiling over but no one was sure it could be defeated, given that it had full support of the Federal government. Of course, we all know now how it went down. Sabahans gave BN a rude shock by voting in PBS despite the possibility of hardship.

BERJAYA sunk and Sabahans were punished with weeks of mayhem that resulted in deaths – because they had exercised their democratic rights.


Soon, what was merely a political issue turned into a religious one and people took to the street. Most agree (including some politicians who were directly or indirectly involved in the demonstration itself) that the majority of the rioters were non-citizens. One rioter – a Filipino carpenter on a working-pass – was shot dead when he charged at a policeman, his machete against the latter’s revolver.

Some in recent years have suggested that the riot was a lot more sinister than it seemed. There were suggestions of an attempt to destabilize Sabah so that it would be placed under martial law. This appears plausible because, after all, the late Tun Mustapha had called for Kuala Lumpur to intervene and take over the State (a).

An excerpt from M.D Mutalib’s book:

Mutalib : Apakah insiden yang tidak dapat saudara lupakan dalam Rusuhan 1986?

Hassnar : Gerakan haram untuk mencetuskan rusuhan tidak mencapai kejayaan kerana beberapa halangan sehingga desakan agar Kerajaan Persekutuan mengishtiharkan Darurat seperti Perisitiwa 13 Mei 1969 tidak kecapaian, walaupun perintah berkurung dikuatkuasakan beberapa hari.
Saya terkejut ketika Pesuruhjaya Polis Sabah, Maulana Babjee memanggil saya dan mengarahkan saya membunuh beberapa orang Kadazan dan Cina untuk mencetuskan rusuhan kaum. Saya tergamam.

In retrospect, racial clashes were very close to taking place, had it not been for the cool-headed restraint of our leaders – notably those among the Kadazan community. A friend who was a party worker with PBS then related to me an incident where he was among a group manning a roadblock alongside the police. The road block was on one of the roads in Papar which led to Kota Kinabalu. Around midnight, they stopped two truckloads of people armed with various weapons, who identified themselves as natives from Sipitang, which is about 200 kilometres away from Kota Kinabalu in the interior of Sabah. These people said they were on their way to fight those foreigners who came and harmed ‘orang kita‘. The police of course rightly refused them passage in view of their intention and also due to the fact that a curfew had been imposed.

When they refused to obey, my friend went and reasoned with them and got a tongue lashing for this. They said to him, “Are you with your people or are you with those foreigners?!”

My friend confessed that he almost lost his composure. In other parts of the districts in Sabah, similar scenes were taking place. People were gathering arms ready to bring battle, but were advised against doing so.

Perhaps in an effort to move on and reconcile, this ugly episode was never mentioned openly during the immediate subsequent years. As far as I know, no one was prosecuted for this crime against the Sabahans. There were claims of rape but we would never know the veracity of this allegation because no investigation was carried out.

It looked like this ugly history would soon disappear and be forgotten or unknown by younger generation of Sabahans and Malaysians at large. Hence, I was pleasantly surprised and excited when a young friend of mine, Nadira Ilana, sent me a message informing me that she had received a grant to fund her documentary about the riot. A group of us had been discussing about this and exchanging notes about it in our Facebook group and I noticed that Nadira had joined in with the discussion. If memory serves me right, I think she said it would be a good idea to do a documentary about it.

Eventually we moved on to other topics and forgot about what Nadira said. For her documentary, she intended to interview some well-known politicians for their take on the riot. I must confess here that I thought she would have trouble getting these people to talk openly about it, but she proved me wrong. Never have I been more happy to be proven wrong!

A few months later, her documentary debuted and not only did it come to fruition, it won the Justin Louis Award for Most Outstanding Human Rights documentary during the 2012 Freedom Film Fest. The film was recently uploaded to YouTube on 21 January and has been viewed more than 10,000 times.

For doubting Nadira, I therefore am punishing myself by writing this piece to introduce her video to you.

Friday, January 25, 2013

Tipu-tipu Pilihanraya

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Kami memang barua UMNO
Menengokkan gambar diatas, jelas 2 ekor barua ini happy.

Seekor di sebelah kiri berkepala botak berkilat dengan pipi menggelembung dah macam insang ikan, tersenyum tak nampak gigi sampai kecik-kecik pelupuk mata.

Seekor lagi di sebelah kanan pendek kontot, tak kurang happynya menayang kad memberitahu betapa kasihnya pada UMNO yg telah memberikannya rezeki mencekik sampai ketat kolar baju.

Bapak sapa la 2 ekor barua ini. Malu kat anak-anak...

2 ekor barua ini hidup bahagia menyokong kerja menipu [Disini]. Bangun paginya dgn niat, "sahaja aku akan menipu hari ini kerana UMNO dulu, kini dan selamanya sampai masuk kubur".

Dah tua dgn diri, tak ada gaya langsung nak meninggalkan kerja menipu. Mungkin 2 ekor barua ini ingin meninggalkan dunia ini dan berhijarah ke satu alam lagi dgn membawak gelaran penipu. 

Tak guna bercerita dosa pahala, telinga 2 ekor barua ini sudah tuli. Nanti kena tuang timah cair, baru sembuh tulinya.

Celik mata dari tidur, katil itu dibeli hasil gaji besar sebagai barua. Bangun berdiri dan berjalan ke jamban, lantai hasil kerja menipu. Jamban hasil kerja menipu. Rumah macam istana hasil menipu. Suaplah nasik baca Bismillah seribu kali pun, tetap dari hasil menipu. 

Apa yg bukan dari hasil menipu?

Lubang 6x6. Lubang kubur. Sebab lubang kubur untuk 2 ekor barua ini akan dikorek di kawasan tanah pekuburan Islam. Tanah wakaf.

Tapi tak tau la pulak sebab, org banyak duit macam 2 ekor barua ini mungkin masing-masing dah booking satu lot di Nirvana Memorial Park.


A Leaked Letter From Sir Alex to FA of England

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Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Terbaek Dari Facebook - Ramalan Sebuah Volkswagen Buruk (Foto)

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Berkata-kata hati kecil Haji Najib, "kita kena Islamik, kita tukar kepada kalendar Hijrah apabila saya, Zol Kolom & Nasa Nazak selamat pulang tak kena bom di Gaza"

Artikel Cedok - Ambiga: What happened in Sabah long ago..

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Artikel ditulis oleh Nigel Aw (MsiaKini) dan muncul di blog Dr Dzul ini mendapati kepala SPR semakin hari semakin menjadi baruanya dan tidak ada malu selindung langsung dgn sikap baruanya. Di seolah bangga menjadi barua UMNO.

Bapak barua ini pernah menyatakan senarai pemilih Malaysia adalah yg tercantik, terseksi dan terbersih di dunia. LANCAW.

Didalam artikel ini juga ada menyebut, Ambiga tidak menolak kebarangkalian akan ada himpunan BERSIH sekali lagi.

Ready garam, tuala kecik & air mineral sebotol dua dalam beg galas.

Ambiga: What happened in Sabah long ago is also happening in Peninsular Malaysia now
January 22, 2013

Ambiga: EC can’t wait until after RCI to act Bersih co-chairperson Ambiga Sreenevasan has insisted that the Election Commission (EC) immediately lays out its plans to clean up the electoral roll in light of revelations on the existence of illegal voters.

“Given that the election is around the corner, the EC owes the public an immediate response,” she told a press conference in Kuala Lumpur today.

EC chief Abdul Aziz Mohd Yusof  had last Thursday declined to comment on the revelations, made before the ongoing royal commission of inquiry (RCI) on immigrants in Sabah, until the proceedings are concluded.

However, Ambiga warned that any delay may have serious repercussions as what has been revealed at the RCI may be occurring in Peninsular Malaysia and Sarawak as well. “(The testimony proves) that what Bersih has been saying is correct. What happened in Sabah long ago is also happening in Peninsular Malaysia now,” she said.

Ambiga pointed to the Malaysian Electoral Roll Analysis Project (Merap) which she said found similar indications in the electoral roll of the fourth quarter of last year.

Merap research assistant Lee Wee Tak said one concern was with the issue of untraceable voters – an example is the case of several voters with code 71 in their MyKad number being ‘stuffed’ in a single address without being traceable.

Code 71 refers to people whose country of origin is unknown, special numbers were not assigned to specific countries in the past for foreigners who have become naturalised citizens.

“There were nine voters with the address 12, Jalan 4A/27A in Wangsa Maju. When we went to check the address we found it to be a roti canai shop,” said Lee.

“The person in charge there said he could only recognise one of the names (registered to) his unit.”

For this reason, Ambiga suggested that the RCI should be extended nationwide. She acknowledged that there is no legal way to postpone the general election to rectify such problems but said the government could still delay it until expiry of the parliamentary term.

“It will be good if there is commitment to clean up the electoral roll between now and the general election which has to be held, at the latest, in June.

“If (the government is) willing to postpone it to June to (allow time to) clean the electoral roll, I’m sure the civil society and public would be willing to wait.”

Opacity of operations 
Ambiga said civil society is also willing to assist the EC with the clean-up effort. She noted that the EC had, last November, set up a unit to clean up the electoral roll but had been opaque about its progress.

“What has the unit done? There has been no report whatsoever. There is lack of transparency. The problem is they are not telling the public what they are doing and have not shown themselves to be independent,” she said.

She reiterated her call for the EC’s highest officials to resign if they fail to act on this matter immediately.

“The severity of the allegations undermine the already low public confidence in the electoral system and may impair the EC’s ability to conduct elections,” she said. “Last year the EC chief said that we have the cleanest electoral roll in the world. Now that there is the RCI, what does he has to say?”

Asked if Bersih will hold more rallies to push the issue. Ambiga replied: “How many rallies will it take to get the message through?”

Bersih’s immediate goal is to encourage a high voter turnout to mitigate the impact of fraud, she reiterated.

Also present at the press conference was Bersih co-chairperson A Samad Said and steering committee members K Arumugam and Liau Kok Fah.

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Merangkak-rangkak Bawani Mintak Ampun

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Versi kertas 'tisu', putih blonde. Mcm orang putih!
Syukur, Sharifah Zohra Jubin Jamban Jabeen telah pun memaafkan Bawani [Disini]. Ini diibaratkan orang yg dipijak kakinya diberi ampun oleh si pemijak kakinya. Apa punya auta.

Kompomlah si Jabeen ini makhluk yg dah bulat tekadnya bersama UMNO. Dia akan menggosok dan menggilap telor UMNO, untung-untung ada masyuuuuuk. Mudah2an.

Kalau nak diikutkan, para blogger pun sedia memaafkan Madey yg selalu digelar Mahafiraun,

2. Raise Stim yg selalu diwar-warkan seorang perogol amah bersiri,
3. Raheem 'thambi' Kecik yg telah mengutil budak sekolah sampai buncit,
4. Shafiee Menggatal projek RM100,000 sejam dgn Zahida Menggatal,
5. Broheng Ali yg selalu aku gelar Taiko Berudu,
6. Asang Ali kaki hamprak hutang bank juta-juta tapi haram tak mau bayar sekupang pun.
7. Zol Kolom kaki pau, hutang p/raya sampai ke laaaaa ni buat2 tak reti.

Mereka ini semua telah diampun oleh para blogger. Jgn buat lagi. Kah kah kah!!!

Sebenarnya, satu Malaya tidak memaksa Sharifah Zohra Jubin Jamban Jabeen mintak maaf pada Bawani. Lantaklah. 

Cumanya kasi tau la, selalu cakap Tamil kat rumah?

Yg ini versi 'cebok', gelap sikit.
kah kah kah!!!

Artikel Cedok - Dari Blog Dr Dzulkefly Ahmad

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Berikut ialah artikel yg aku cedok dari blog Dr Dzul [Disini], inti-patinya berkenaan kelaku haramjadah Mahafiraun yg telah bagi I.C suka-suka bapak dia kepada pendatang asing.

Teruskan membaca, ketahuilah tipu-daya-auta-keling gerombolan UMNO yg ingin terus berkuasa ada 1001 macam.

Kalau time kuat pun dia nak menipu, sekarang ini apatah lagi.

Jika masa kuat Umno buat, apa lagi masa sekarang… 
Januari 21, 2013

1. Menyebutkan bahawa Umno dan Tun Mahathir sedang menggelabah menangani isu RCI Projek IC adalah terlalu lunak. Umum sedang memantau gelagat mereka sekarang ini. Bukanlah apa yang telah berlaku itu yang menjadi tumpuan utama, tetapi lebih penting bagi rakyat ialah mungkinkah sedang berulang segala episod perbuatan khianat dan jahat itu, menjelang pilihanraya umum ke-13 ini?

2. Dalam keadaan mereka kuat dulu pun mereka lakukan segala rencana jahat ini, maka apa yang akan menghalang mereka dari mengulagi perbuatan terkutuk ini menjelang PRU ke-13 ini yang bakal merupakan satu pertempuran yang paling sengit dan getir kerana Umno-BN mungkin sahaja akan kehilangan kuasa di peringkat kerajaan Pusat.

3. Inilah yang tersirat dalam desakan supaya RCI Projek IC Sabah ini dilangsungkan juga, meskipun kerajaan Umno-BN di peringkat Persekutuan sangat sangsi akan kesudahannya dan risiko bencana yang bakal menimpa mereka kelak setelah semuanya terdedah.

4. Dalam kegelabahan itu Umno akan terus melakukan kesilapan demi kesilapan. Umno telah terkena badi perbuatan buruk mereka sendiri. Penulis meramalkan RCI Projek IC Sabah ini, tampaknya akan menjadi lebih parah lagi dari pendedahan Deepak terhadap PM Najib dan isterinya Rosmah. RCI telah pun tampak membibitkan perpecahan di antara parti-parti komponen BN akibat mulut celupar Tun Mahathir.

5. Terkini anak mantan Presiden MIC, S Vell Paari telah mengecam dan menyelar Tun akan hasutan yang dihamburkannya tentang kaum India dan Cina bersabitan kerakyatan semasa era kemerdekaan dahulu. Vell Paari adalah Pengarah Strategik MIC. Pimpinan tertinggi MCA, MIC serta Gerakan sebagai parti komponen BN didesak untuk menyatakan pendirian secara berani dan tegas.

6. Dalam kegelabahan menangani pendedahan RCI Sabah ini, Tun Mahathir ternyata sangat kaget dan hilang sentuhan berbisanya sebagai seorang yang lazimnya mendapat jolokan sebagai “Master Strategist”. Pun begitu Tun pantas membuat ‘forward defence’ atau tindakan serangan ‘preemptif’ lalu terus menembak peluru pertamanya. Namun langkahnya sumbang bahkan mengundang kecelakaan untuknya dirinya dan Umno itu sendiri.

7. Dalam keadaan diaibkan ini Tun Mahathir yang satu ketika dahulu menafikan kesemua tuduhan kewujudan Pojek IC ini, menuding jadi kearah pihak lain bagi merasionalisasikan perbuatannya itu dan cuba sekali lagi memperbodohkan rakyat.

8. Amat malang orang yang menjadi sasarannya adalah seorang yang tidak lagi mampu mempertahankan dirinya kerana peribadi itu adalah Al-Marhum Tunku Abdul Rahman Perdana Menteri Malaysia yang pertama.

9. Tun berhujjah kalau apa yang dilakukan itu salah, maka Tunku juga salah dan melakukan ‘lebih teruk’ lagi dari beliau kerana memberi kerakyatan kepada 1 juta warga asing Tanah Melayu semasa sebelum kemerdekaan dulu.

10. Bukan sahaja tuduhan terhadap Al-Marhum Tunku sebagai paling tidak sopan dan biadap, Tun ini lupa bahawa beliau mengundang dua kali kecelakaan atau ‘double-whammy’.

11. Pertama, pendedahan laporan andainya disahkan benar benar berlaku oleh RCI akan secara langsung berlanggaran dengan peraturan pemberian kerakyatan kepada warga asing akan mengakibatkan Umno-BN dan PM Najib dan Tun sendiri serta kesemua yang terlibat tertakluk kepada jenayah melakukan satu ‘treason’ yakni khianat kepada negara dan

12. Kedua, menuduh Tunku dengan apa yang sebenarnya adalah sebahagian syarat dalam ‘Kontrak Sosial’ yang disepakati sebelum Malaya mendapat kemerdekaan dahulu yang serentak memberikan kedudukan istimewa orang Melayu di bawah perkara 153 dalam Perlembagaan Persekutuan dan pengukuhan kedudukan dan kuasa Majlis Raja-Raja adalah perbuatan biadap dan tidak amanah kepada fakta sejarah.

13. Lebih parah lagi dalam hal ini adalah sebutan bahawa orang Melayu telah banyak berkorban dan bertolak ansur serta menghasut suasana perkauman dengan menyebutkan bahawa kaum Cina dan India tidak bersyukur. Perbuatan itu adalah sangat tidak bertanggungjawab selaku seorag mantan Perdana Menteri sekaligus mencetuskan kebrentakan antara kaum seperti terserlah dalam ledakan anak Samy Vellu yang melenting dan menyelarnya.

14. Kembali kepada pokok perbahasan, bahawa rakyat kini matang dan celik pengetahuan. Umum sangat boleh membezakan kedua-dua hal ini, kerakyatan yang diberikan kepada warga asing dan tahu tentang fakta sejarahya.

15. Jelasnya bahawa tidak ada unsur untuk menipu dalam pilihanraya dalam proses pemberian kerakyatan semesa era Tunku dahulu. Tun sendiri tahu bahawa kerakyatan yang diberikan dua minggu sebelum pilihanraya negeri Sabah itu tentunya mempunyai perbezaan motif dan objektif yang ketara.

16. Apakah RCI Projek IC Sabah akan terus mencalar kredibiliti Najib dan bakal mencetuskan puting beliung serta kebrentakan dalam BN? Mampukah rakyat memberikannya sekali lagi peluang untuk Umno-BN dan Najib?

17. Belum pun sempat untuk menangani serangan Deepak kini Najib yang berada di luar negara, terpaksa membuat ‘damage control’ akibat gelagat tak berkesudahan serta ‘tantrum’ Tun Mahathir di saat-saat menemui garis penamat dihujung parlimen ke-12 ini. Amat malang buat Najib!

Pakatan Rakyat wajar bersiap menggalas amanah besar mengurus Putrajaya sebelum negara tercinta ini musnah dan lebur secara sempurna dek perbuatan pimpinan Umno-BN!

Dr Dzulkefly Ahmad, Pengarah Eksekutif Penyelidikan Pas Pusat.

Monday, January 21, 2013

Crazy Congo Dance [Video]

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Terbaek Dari Facebook - Solat Seorang Pilot

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Ini bukan pilot MAS. 

Pilot itu orang Libya mengerjakan solat Maghrib.

Atas landasan pun OK bila mana masa terlalu suntuk untuk beliau pergi ke surau airport. Surau di mana-mana pun kecik dan beberapa rules kena observe:

1 bukak seluar, 
2 bukak spenda, 
3 cari tempat sangkut seluar & spenda
4 pakai kain pelikat, 
5 ambik wuduk,
6 dan cari kopiah wakaf di surau,
7 baru boleh solat.

Ini sahaja makan masa 10 minit.

Itu belum masuk kira masa diambil untuk menggulung dompet dalam gulungan kain pelikat. Belum kira masa menghampar sejadah.

Kita orang Melayu amat bertertib dan berukun. Kah kah kah!


Sunday, January 20, 2013

Eh! Saya Bukan Bini No. 2 Fatol Bari.

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Laaaaa.... potong laaa.

Dicedok dari Gendang Perang

Seorang wanita semalam mendakwa gambar di atas adalah gambarnya. Beliau turut menyatakan beliau bukan isteri kepada Fathul Bari tetapi isteri kepada seorang lelaki lain.

Oleh kerana blog ini turut memaparkan gambar tersebut semalam dan setelah disemak gambar di atas adalah mirip kepada pemilik blog http://nurulain8888.blogspot.com/

Admin telah mengambil keputusan memusnahkan gambar tersebut dari lokasinya di artikel "Pensyarah ni nak makan pengat"dan memohon maaf secara terbuka kepada pemilik asal gambar tersebut.

Sama ada benar atau tidak tuntutannya tidak penting kerana gambar di blog beliau memang ada iras-iras gadis bertudung hitam dalam gambar di atas.

Gambor Bini Muda Fatol Bari

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Gambor di cedok dari Manjung Mari
Lawo orangnya. Macam mana la tak tap-tap-tap menitik ayor lior Fatol Bari.

Nasib baik dapat kat Fatol Bari, kalo idak alamatnya bersepai le tulang. Isi pun tak jumpa.

Kah kah kah!!!


Hilux 4WD Iblis

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Gambar di cedok dari blog Mimpi Senja

Hilux ini di pandu iblis. Laju macam iblis. 

Hilux iblis ini wujud di jalanraya M'sia sahaja. Hilux iblis ini telah pun berjaya ditahan oleh syaikat peras ugut AES.

Semasa ditahan, Hilux iblis ini mencatat kelajuan 789 km/j!!! Nak merembat pun janganlah mengarut sangat, patut-patut la.

Bukan rakyat jelata shj yg dirembat kroni, makhluk halus pun kena.

Kah kah kah!!!! 

Rasa nak guling-guling main taik lah. Kah kah kah!!!

Terbaek Dari Facebook - Orang Kuale Repair Kereta

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Gambor ini aku kutip dari Group Facebook Kuala Kangsar Tetap Dihati


Tak tau le aku, kat mana demer buat khoje ghope ini.
Kut rebah kereta tu, naya weh!

Saturday, January 19, 2013

Terbaek Dari Facebook - Salesman Ter'top' Di Johor

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Tengoklah muka mamat ini. Lembut, senang senyum dan nampak baik hati.

Kalau maen, tak keluar bunyi. Berak tak keluar bau. Kencing lawas, tak menggigil. Pijak semut pun tak mati.

Tapi jgn terpedaya.

Projek Pengerang punya pasal, mamat ini boleh korek kubur [Disini] nenek hang tau?

Keistimewaan Fatol Bari

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Terkini, sibuk orang bercerita pasal Fatol Bari dapat tanah baru.

Suka la Fatol Bari dapat tanah, lebar 2 jari panjang 3 inci. Tanah lain macam pulak tu. Kah kah kah! Tanah seberang laut.

Sebenarnya, yg bercerita berbuih-buih mulut itu ini tentang Fatol yg menikah di Siam itu, cemburu sebenarnya. Fatol dapat projek baru, dia tak dapat.

Fatol Bari ini istimewa orangnya. Aku pernah sembahyang tarawikh berimamkan Fatol Bari. Baca sedap, kuat dan lantang. Maklumlah orang belajar agama tinggi.

Muka berminyak. Bagi tazkirah, tapi mata tengok siling, tengok lantai, tengok jam dinding. Kah kah kah!

Entah AJK mana la yg jempot dia makan mihun bersama-sama kami pada malam itu, aku pun tak tau.

Itulah pertama kali aku bersua muka dgn Fatol Bari dan aku dapati dia memang istimewa. 

Dia juga istimewa seperti mana istimewanya pembesar-pembesar negara yg masuk TV secara langsung ketika bersembahyang Jumaat atau pun sembahyang raya.

Wuduk mereka ini tahan lama. Bukan macam wuduk kita. Tiap kali nak sembahyang ambik wuduk baru.

Wuduk Fatol Bari juga tahan lama.

Maka kompom lah Fatol Bari ini bukan kaki kentut, sebab itu dia sembahyang pakai stokin. Kah kah kah!!!

Berbuih mulut Fatol bercerita syoknya dapat bini baru

Thursday, January 17, 2013

Mengekek-ngekek Mak-mak Datin Jamah Ponggong Kuali

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Dato' Dr Kuali


[Di sini] disiarkan dalam Utusan Meloya, tentang kolej-kolej ditipu. Ribuan ringgit hangus.

Tetapi, sampai Mahafiraun masuk kubur pun, tidak akan keluar berita kolej penipu. Menipu yuran. Menipu ijazah. Menipu akreditasi. PTPTN penipu.

Beli ijazah? Berlambak.
Diatas ialah gambar seekor lahanun lahanat yg suatu masa dulu pengusaha kolej swasta, Fazley International School.
Dulu namanya 'Dr' Fazley. Aku pernah buat posting pasal lahanun ini. [Disini]
Lahanun ini dah bergelar Dato'. Ini kompom Pahang bagi ni... kah kah kah
Dah puas menipu student, Dr Palabana ini meniaga kuali
Berparti kuali..

Mengekek-ngekek mak-mak datin jamah ponggong kuali!
Kah kah kah!!!

Otai ini pun seorang 'Dr', jgn memain!

Terbaek Dari Facebook - Mahafiraun Punya Kepala Lucah

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Rambut pun aurat jugak, jgn tak tau.
Banyak sangat bercakap pasal aurat,
itu pasal bini Mahafiraun dah botak!
Kah kah kah!

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Patrick Teoh Anak Haram

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Sebarkan kawan-kawan, aku dpt dari blog WartaSubhi



Celaka Cina ni. 

Berikut terjemahan sedikit sebanyak pada perenggan 4 & 5.

Apa jenis motivasi memantat yg mereka (PAS) mahu?
Buang keperibadian dan jadi biri-biri?
Sembahyang 5 waktu?
Tutup selubung semua wanita?

Tolong bagitau kami apa memantat yg dikatakan tarian dan nyanyian melampau itu?

Perenggan terakhir korang terjemahlah sendiri.

Kita tunggu apa reaksi mufti-mufti yg makan gaji berbelas/berpuloh ribu sebulan. Sedap gaji tu.

Jubin Jamban JABEEN

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4 keping jubin jamban Jabeen

Hina hidup menjadi seekor barua. Tiada pekerjaan lain yg sehina menjadi seekor barua. 

Si Jabeen mungkin disaat ini menyesal kenapa dilahirkan dan kalau diberi peluang, dia akan menyondol-nyondolkan kepalanya ke celah kangkang ibunya. Dia nak masuk balik duduk dalam perut mak.

Satu Malaya sedang mencarut-carutkan nama si Jabeen.

UMNO tak ambil pot, PKimmak Kimma suku-sakat sendiri pun tak mengaku kawan & UUM dah lama cabut lari.

Ini dah lebih hina dari Broheng Ali. Kurang-kurangnya Broheng Ali boleh berkata,
'Listen! Aku masih Taiko Berudu!

Zol Kolom masih boleh berkata, 
'Listen, bisol aku masih blom meletop daaaa!'

Asang Ali masih lagi dgn muka tak tau malu dan hidung terkembang-terkuncup akan berkata, 
'Listen, aku masih berhutang dgn bank dan aku tak nak bayor!'

Kah kah kah!!!





Terbaek Dari Facebook - Teknoloji

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Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Jabeen ke JAMBAN? Eja Betol-betol!

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Tak ada difference...

Puak-puak ini sama shj kat mana2 pun di dunia ini.

Nak buat macam mana, datang naik tongkang.
Memang sejak zaman Melaka dah buat auta.
Ayat 'auta keling' itu sudah masyhur dan Hang Tuah pun kerap guna.

Jgn tak tau, puak-puak ini kat rumah pakai kain sarung.
Jantan pakai kain pelikat, yg betina pakai kain batik.
Cakap Tamil kuat-kuat. Kaki-tangan semua naik.
Kadang-kadang makan sireh.
Hari minggu makan kari kambing.
Kambing settle, semua pakat berguling depan ruang tamu. Kah kah kah!
Panas woo.
டே தம்பி, கலப்பை nombor பாஸ் வேகம்! Kah kah kah!

Kalau dapat kat Thambi Kecik ni, baru dia ada akai,
tak sempat nak berlisten-listenlah la..

Archeologists Unearth Alien-Like Skulls In A Mexico Cemetery

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Archeologists have unearthed what looks like a cone-shaped alien skull from 1,000 years ago in Mexico.

The skull, which dates from 945 A.D. to 1308 A.D., was discovered accidentally while digging an irrigation system in the northwest state of Sonora in Mexico.

Cristina Garcia Moreno, who worked on the project with Arizona State University, explained that 13 of the 25 skulls found in the Hispanic cemetery had these deformed heads.

“We don’t know why this population specifically deformed their heads,” Moreno told ABC News.

The site, known as El Cementerio, was discovered in 1999, but the team just completed their analysis of the skeletal remains last month. They plan to continue their research during the next field season. Archaeologists also discovered artifacts on the site, like pendants, nose rings and jewelry.

They said the deformation of human skulls was part of an ancient ritual that took place 1,000 years ago. The deformation was achieved by binding a person’s head between two blocks of wood to apply pressure on the skull by wrapping the wood with bands.

“Cranial deformation has been used by different societies in the world as a ritual practice, or for distinction of status within a group or to distinguish between social groups,” Moreno told ABC News. “The reason why these individuals at El Cementerio deformed their skulls is still unknown.”

The team said that many of the bones unearthed were the remains of children, leading them to believe the practice of deforming skulls “may have been inlet and dangerous.”

The Chinook of the U.S. Northwest and the Choctaw of the U.S. Southeast both were known for practicing skull deformation as well.

Moreno told ABC that people deformed their heads in Mexico because they wanted to distinguish important people, or they wanted to distinguish people from one group from another.

Source: redorbit

Monday, January 14, 2013

Zahida Menggatal vs Stadium Merdeka

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Sekarang ini mungkin telah ketahuan khabar-khabar angin dikalangan penyokong pembangkang betapa bangsatnya pemerintah yg telah menyewakan Stadium Merdeka untuk Himpunan Kebangkitan Rakyat baru-baru ini dengan harga RM100,000-00. 

Tidak diketahui berapa jumlah dikenakan kepada Bon Jovi 19 tahun dahulu. Juga tidak diketahui berapa Michael Jackson bayar untuk konsertnya di Stadium Merdeka. Tapi untuk orang luar, meskipun jumlahnya RM200,000-00, itu masuk akal. Lu nak guna stadium gua, lu jgn banyak songel, lu bayar.

Tapi untuk anak tempatan berkumpul, menyanyi, berpuisi, pun jumlahnya RM100,000-00? Untuk 3 jam. Bukan 3 hari 3 malam! Itulah kisah HKR dan RM100,000-00.

Ada 2 lagi kisah duit RM100,000-00.

Bagi peminat TV3 suku dan Utusan Meloya, mereka mungkin tak pernah tahu kisah tahyul seekor anak badak terguling-guling dalam bilik hotel di Dubai yg sewaannya RM100,000-00 semalaman dilangsaikan dgn duit rakyat. Itu kalau dia berguling-guling dan berendam semalaman. Kalau 3 malam dah berapa? Tapi takpa lah, mungkin jugak Kaldai Karpet yg belanja.

Bagi yg kurang ambik pot pula, ada satu lagi kisah karut-marut. Pernah dengar nama Zahida Menggatal? Nama Zahida Menggatal mungkin asing. Yang mereka tahu ialah Zahida Rafik yg seksi dan bergetah melekit-lekit tu, kan?

Baiklah, Zahida Menggatal ini ialah teman wanita kepada Shafie Menggatal. Ada jugak kisah duit RM100,000-00 di sini. Shafie Menggatal ialah orang Sabah. Tak tau la pulak samada Shafie bin Menggatal atau pun cuma nama jolokan bagi orang yg berasal dari Menggatal, Sabah.

Namun telah diketahui umum Shafie Menggatal ini telah termenggatal dan mungkin telah terjolok? Kah kah kah!

Sekali jolok kena pau RM100,000-00. 4 kali jolok kena pau RM400,000-00.

Apa punya style jolok ni? Kah kah kah

Stadium Merdeka 3 jam kena bayar RM100,000-00. 

Bayangkan kalau Shafie Menggatal larat membalon 3 jam? RM300,000-00!

Takkan membalon sampai 3 jam.... Kah kah kah!!!

Kah kah kah!

Man Utd 19 - 0 Liverpool

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Man Utd 2 - 1 Liverpool, Patrice Evra Is A Red

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When a diminutive Frenchman was hauled off after 45 minutes of his first Manchester derby, not many amongst the United fans in the crowd would have imagined that the same player would go on to become captain – albeit in absence of Nemanja Vidic – and develop a cult following at the club.

Seven years ago today, Patrice Evra put pen to paper on a deal worth £5.5m that sealed his arrival to Manchester United from Ligue 1 side Monaco, the same outfit with which he had finished second best in the 2004 Champions League final. The last stage of Europe’s elite club competition is probably likely to remain a wonderful exception in Monaco’s history but, since his arrival at United, Evra went on to play on club’s football most important stage another three times – winning against Chelsea in Moscow, before surrendering to Barcelona in 2009 and 2011.

Considering the torrid start to his English career he had endured, and despite some shaky performances over the last two seasons, the contribution Evra has offered to the club – and not only in terms of trophies – is such that he can genuinely be considered one of Ferguson’s best purchases since the turn of the century.

As confident at launching into marauding runs forward as he is when marking a direct opponent, Evra proved to be the perfect replacement for Denis Irwin, as he saw off competition from Gabriel Heinze and countryman Mikael Silvestre, growing slowly, yet ever so steadily, into making the left-back position his own.

Over the last few years Evra has attracted unwanted limelight for some poor performances, particularly considering the high standard United fans had become accustomed to since the Frenchman had become a regular in the 2006-07 season. Despite captaining the club last season, his showings convinced Sir Alex Ferguson to bring in Alex Buttner during the summer transfer window to provide a challenge for the Frenchman. A challenge to which Evra has risen for, while not reaching the peak of a few seasons ago, Evra’s performances have definitely improved this year.

Last season was particularly difficult for the Frenchman, who was involved in the disgusting racist row sparked by Luis Suarez’s comments during the game at Anfield. Evra came through that rough patch slightly affected on the pitch perhaps, but with an even bigger status among the fans.

What has made the man who candidly admitted that “playing for Manchester United was something I was not prepared for” a very popular figure at Old Trafford, though is his attitude towards the club. In an era when homegrown players are as rare as tabloid pages without scandals and where many players have their heads turned by the prospect of bigger wages, Evra has wholly embraced the culture of the club, in a way reminiscing of another illustrious Frenchman.

With the exception of Eric Cantona, very few foreign players (foreign in the loose, footballing sense, which considers Irish and Welsh players as local) have displayed such burning passion towards the club. In fact, Evra’s endorsement of what fans simply describe as “being a Red” surpasses even some of his British teammates’.

Forget about the Craig Bellamy-type “I always wanted to play for this club” line, Evra has demonstrated his feelings for United in many interviews, as well as on the pitch. Sometimes, as it was the case when Liverpool visited Old Trafford last season, the line between player and fans became too blurred for his own sake but while that sparked Sir Alex’s ire, it only increased Patrice’s popularity with the fans.

When, in twenty or thirty years time, United fans will be talking about a left-back that loved the club and won four league titles, four Champions League, a FIFA Club World Cup and three league cups, younger generations will struggle to believe that it all began with a shaky 45 minutes against Manchester City.

Merci, Patrice

Source: Red Rant

Man Utd 2 - 1 Liverpool, The Man Who Started The Manchester vs Liverpool Rivalry

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“Liverpool were always the ones and nothing will change,” said Ferguson at this weekend’s press conference. “It’s nothing to do with our position in the league. It’s about the history, geography. What’s his name, who built the ship canal? Mason? No it wasnae Mason… It’s coming… It begins with an A. Adamson. Correct? Daniel Adamson was the engineer behind the construction of the canal. He took all the industry away from Liverpool to Manchester. From that day on, the rivalry between the cities was there. Therefore, it’s not just football; geographically, there is fantastic competition. Of course, being the two most successful clubs, that has intensified over the years and that won’t change. If we two were bottom of the league or in the second division it would be the same.”

Daniel Adamson left school at the age of thirteen and became an apprentice to Timothy Hackworth, engineer to the Stockton and Darlington Railway, with whom he went on to serve as a draughtsman and engineer. By 1850, he had risen to become general manager of the Stockton and Darlington engine works and moved to become manager of Heaton Foundry in Stockport. He specialised in engine and boiler making, initially following designs created by Hackworth, making and exporting the renowned “Manchester Boilers”.

Liverpool were one of the world’s leading ports at the time, whilst Manchester was booming in the cotton trade thanks to mills. Raw cotton imported to England was spun in the mills of Manchester and it was said that Manchester clothed a quarter of the world. However, the material all had to come from over 30 miles away through Liverpool, and the Port of Liverpool set high charges on the importation of the raw materials destined for our cotton mills. Manchester decided that something had to be done, and that’s when the idea of the Manchester Ship Canal first came about, with the aim of by-passing Liverpool to import to the raw cotton.

Adamson lived in Didsbury and in 1882 arranged a meeting at his home to discuss the Manchester Ship Canal project, attended by the mayors of Manchester and surrounding towns, leaders of commerce and industry, bankers and financiers. Adamson was elected chairman of the provisional committee promoting the Ship Canal, and was at the forefront in pushing the scheme through Parliament in the face of intense opposition from railway companies and port interests in Liverpool.

The ship canal was given the go ahead and construction began in 1887. Adamson died at home in 1890 and is buried at Southern Cemetery in Manchester. The ship canal wasn’t in operation until 1894 though so, sadly, he never saw the Ship Canal in use.

Source: ROM