Friday, December 28, 2012

Tuan Ibrahim Tuan Man Yang Terang Hatinya

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Dalam berjuta-juta umat Melayu Islam di Malaysia, ada yg tak setuju kalimah Allah digunakan agama/bangsa lain dan ada juga yg setuju kalimah itu dikongsi bersama penggunaannya.


Aku dari dulu tak setuju kalimah itu suka-suka dikongsi-pakai oleh agama/bangsa lain.

Hujah aku, 'Awat? Agama hang tuhan tak dak nama ka?'


Kenapa mereka-mereka itu beriya-iya nak jugak guna kalimah Allah? Sedangkan kitab berbahasa Inggeris mereka menggunakan perkataan 'God' atau 'Lord'.

Kalau iya pun sudah ada kitab yg berbahasa Melayu, gunalah perkataan 'Tuhan', kan? Itulah terjemahan tepat.



Dalam isu penggunaan kalimah Allah dalam Bible versi Bahasa Melayu, pendirian yg dinyatakan oleh Dr Zaharudin Abdul Rahman  terang-terang membantah keras manakala Tuan Ibrahim di HarakahDaily ialah; elakkan.

'Elakkan' itu bahasa persuratan. Bertata-tertib. Bahasa mudahnya, 'jangan'.

Jangan buat. Hang buat jugak, aku kerat ujung 'thambi' hang. Kah kah kah!

Terbaek Dari Facebook/Malaysian Gags

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Thursday, December 27, 2012

Mecca Mall Ada Butik Paris Hilton, KB Mall Ada Burger King

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Hebat. Tak boleh kalah.

Mekah dan Serambi Mekah.

Satu ada kedai fesyen ranggi2 artis, satu lagi ada kedai burger berhawa dingin. Siap tulis jawi. Pakai huruf jawi ni Islamic ke?

Kita ini ahli PAS, kalau bab berdemo bencikan Yahudi, bukan main lagi. Champion!

Bagaimana Burger King boleh terlepas masuk Kota Bharu, aku pun tak tau. Tapi, alaaa... makanan apa la sangat.

Kita dok sedut asap kereta bahaya dah, asap rokok bahaya, air minuman pun dah tercemar, ayam kat pasaraya belum tentu cara sembelihannya, tomyam penuh dengan aji no moto. Kita terdedah kepada banyak unsur-unsur yg boleh menjejaskan kesihatan kita.

Sisa Lynas lagi bahaya, tapi Dr Rosli kata OK. Bahaya yg boleh diurus.

Alaa... setakat Burger King tulis huruf jawi ini, apa la sangat.


Wednesday, December 26, 2012

A Muslim Perspective On Christmas

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by Abdul Malik Mujahid

CHRISTMAS GREETINGS Dec 25: Christmas is an annual Christian religious holiday commemorating the birth of Prophet Jesus, peace be upon him. For many Muslims who even do not celebrate the birthday of the Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, it becomes an issue of what stand they should take.

There have been a number of legitimate criticisms of the holiday from Muslims and non-Muslims based on theological and cultural considerations. However, this cannot be used to disregard the holiday as merely an exercise in ancient pagan practices, for instance, or excessive consumerism. Muslims have to remember that for practicing Christians, Christmas really is about Jesus.

Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, was so accommodating of Christians that according to the two earliest Islamic historians, Ibn Saad and Ibn Hisham, the Prophet even allowed a delegation of 60 Byzantine Christians from Najran in Yemen to worship in his own mosque in Madinah.

Lead by their bishop (Usquf), they had come to discuss a number of issues with him. When time of their prayer came, they asked the Prophet's permission to perform this in the mosque. He answered, "conduct your service here in the mosque. It is a place consecrated to God."

God expects us to stay away from mocking the religious beliefs of others, no matter how much we disagree with them. He says in the Quran: "And insult not those whom they (disbelievers) worship besides God, lest they insult God wrongfully without knowledge. Thus We have made fair-seeming to each people its own doings; then to their Lord is their return and He shall then inform them of all that they used to do" (Quran, 6:108).

We also have to remember that even if for many nominal Christians, the celebration is not really about participating in religious traditions, Christmas is a time for families to get together. In a number of cases it is the only time of year families get together, either because family members are scattered in different parts of the country or the world, because of communication and relationship problems, or because in America today, the family unit is becoming weaker and weaker.

Christmas is a great time to relate to our neighbors. We should not forget though, that "relating" does not mean "preaching". Da'wah cannot be made in a rude manner. Allah says in the Quran: "Invite (all) to the Way of your Lord with wisdom and beautiful advice, and reason with them by ways that are the best and most gracious: because your Lord knows best, (those) who have strayed from His Path, and those who receive guidance " (Quran, 16:125).

In particular, when dealing with Jews and Christians, Allah says: "Do not argue with the People of the Book unless it is in the politest manner, except for those of them who do wrong. Say: 'We believe in what has been sent down to us and what has been sent down to you. Our God and your God is [the same] One, and we are Muslims before Him'" (Quran, 29:46).

This may not be an occasion to emphasis the differences as much as the commonality of our beliefs, unless someone is really asking you about them.

A starting point for a discussion about Christmas could be the Islamic belief in all Books revealed by Allah and all Prophets sent by Him. In this discussion, special emphasis could be made on Prophet Jesus. Non-Muslims are often surprised to discover that Muslims also believe in this noble Prophet and his great mother Mary (peace be upon her).

Remember that respect does not mean compromise. This article is not asking you to compromise anything. You have freedom of religion given by God to believe in what you believe in. But in a world where conflict is increasing, a Muslim should be a bridge- builder and a peacemaker. It was due to the Muslim practice of Islamic ideals of respect and tolerance that the key of the holiest Christian Shrine in Jerusalem, the church of the Holy Sepulcher, remains entrusted with a Muslim family, as it has been for over 1400 years.

These are the lessons which need to be learned by those extremists who attack Christians during their worship in Nigeria and those extremists who burn Masjids in the USA.

Lim Guan Eng Perlu Disunat. Baru Dia Ada Akai!

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Kesalahan tiang ini ialah memakai skirt ketat dan t-shirt
jarang  ketika  Raheem 'Thambi' Kecik lalu berhampiran. 

Di zaman Dollah ZZZ kita ada perogol amah bernama Raees Stim dan perogol ini masih kelihatan berkeliaran di zaman Altantuya ini.

Di zaman Mahafiraun dulu, hidup seorang perogol budak sekolah yg masyhur bernama Raheem 'Thambi' Kecik.

Sampai buncit dan meletup budak itu dikutil Raheem 'Thambi' Kecik. Anehnya tiada seekor Melayu Islam atau NGO Islam yg berani berbesar telur pergi kehadapan menuntut keadilan. Ketika itu mungkin orang kuat Perkasa masih lagi kencing menggigil dan belum bersunat.

Yg pergi membela budak sekolah yg buncit dikutil Raheem 'Thambi' Kecik itu bukan orang Melayu Islam tapi, Lim Guan Eng. Beliau yg makan macam2 dan minum macam2 itulah yg membawa kes budak sekolah kena kutil dengan Raheem 'Thambi' Kecik ini ke mahkamah.

Tapi waktu itu zaman Mahafiraun, apa kata Mahafiraun akan jadi sabda.

Lim Guan Eng kena masuk jel.

Apa Melayu UMNO buat ketika itu? Bersorak melompat memadankan muka Guan Eng bagai nak roboh PWTC.

Tapi YB Lim Guan Eng, baru2 ini hang memandai2 kata perkataan "Allah" (klik sini) itu untuk semua. Betoi ka?

Cuba hang pikiaq betoi2... Mulut berbuih2 sebut "Allah, Allah, Allah" baca depa punya kitab, tapi kat tengkuk ada salib. Apa macam?

Susah nak bagi hang faham bab ini. Kalau 'thambi' hang dah kena sunat sejak kecik macam kami, baru hang faham. Baru hang ada akai.


Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Hadi Awang Terjun Dengan Menantu-menantunya. Biarkan! Biarkan!

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"Saya baru 4 bulan pakai kopiah dan sikit hari lagi
mungkin jadi Ahli Parlimen Larut."
Nik Aziz sayang menantu. Dolah Bedawi sayang menantu. Datuk Z juga sayang menantu.

Tapi Hadi Awang nampaknya tidak mengambil iktibar dari sejarah. Sayang menantu lebih-lebih sangat boleh naik lemak-kelemak budak tu. Boleh jadi haru.

Jgn kita lupa si Ariffahmi, haru sekejap Nik Aziz. Tergolek dog Dolah Bedawi mengikut kata KJ. Juga menantu Datuk Z yg duduk dalam majlis perbandaran Kelang suatu ketika dulu. Haru.

Aku tidak tau wujudnya menantu Hadi Awang bernama Mohd Akmal Kamarudin sehinggalah tersiar kemelut PAS Larut di dalam Sinar Harian.

Ceritanya simple, menantu Hadi Awang itu gatal nak bertanding kerusi DUN Selama. Walhal, telah diketahui hingga ke Mongolia dan sejak Mahafiraun mengaku Melayu lagi, kerusi itu memang untuk Dr Mohd Dhari Othman. Dia anak tempatan. Terpelajar. Dia juga boleh buat kerja berpeluh tengah padang.

Palat. Memang palat. Menantu Hadi Awang ini macam nak main palat style UMNO.

Sekarang taik dah kena kipas siling. Taik dah terpelanting merata-rata. 

Bila kopiah-kopiah dah terpalit taik, barulah ada akai Pemuda PAS Perak nak berbincang. Baru ada geliga keluar dari mulut Tuan Ibrahim, katanya "calon belum rasmi lagi.."

Nak rasmi-rasmi, potong reben la.. Jangan potong line Dr Dhari. 

Saturday, December 8, 2012

Hitam Tiada Kena Mengena Dengan Bangang

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Does Khairy know who Churchill was? 

by Ummu Salmah, Penang

I was shocked to read the UMNO Youth chief Khairy Jamaludin promoting Winston Churchill as role model for his members. Churchill contemptuously called Mahatma Ghandi a 'half naked fakir' and the Palestinians as 'dogs in the manger'. He advocated poisonous gas warfare against 'uncivilised tribes', that is the colonised people. He said no wrong had been done to the American Natives and the Aborigines of Australia because 'a stronger race, a higher grade race has come in and taken its place.'

Khairy needs to study history and identify good role models, not arch racist imperialists like Churchill,.for our youths if he wants, as he claims, to stop Anwae Ibrahim 'inviting foreign intervention.' The minds of Khairy and his band of youths need to be decolonised.

Monday, November 19, 2012

Pssst! Cikgu-cikgi Masih Nak Mengundi UMNO?

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Letih!
Letih la kalau masih nak mengundi UMNO.
Masih tak sedar-sedar.

Sedar la...
Pen beli sendiri.
Pensel beli sendiri.
Marker beli sendiri.

Kertas A4 beli sendiri.
Fotostat duit sendiri.
Dakwat printer kena beli pakai duit sendiri.

Kerja menimbun.
Kerja cikgu-cikgi ni, sibuk sesangatlah!
Nak maen pun kadang-kadang kena tangguh. Kena adjust.
Kadang-kadang langsung berhari-hari tak dapat.
Kahkahkah!

Kerja bawak balik rumah.
Kalaulah boleh claim overtime ok la jugak.
Tension. Boleh naik darah tinggi.
Melempang budak dah tak boleh, nanti kena dakwa-dakwi.

Hari Sabtu pun kena kerja. Sapa kata cikgu cuti hari Sabtu?
Bodo punya Guru Besar/Pengetua. Ini jenis kaki dengki lahanat.

Sudah-sudahlah wahai cikgu-cikdi, jangan dibagi undi kpd UMNO.

Masih tak mau mengundi Pakatan? Masih lagi ingin terhegeh-hegeh mengundi UMNO?
Pergi la tengok muka sendiri dalam cermin bilik air. Pergi basuh muka.
Kemudian pergi masuk bilik, duduk bersila diam-diam sorang-sorang.
Kemudian slow-slow bongkok, sendiri kolomlah!

Psst! Masih nak mengundi UMNO?


Monday, November 12, 2012

Sayang Sarawak Airnya Hujan!

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Kah kah kahkahkahkah!!!
Bukan Selangor negeri pertama yg memberi air percuma kepada rakyatnya,
Khalid Brahim tipu!
Kah kahkahkhak kah!



Tuan-tuan,

Kumpul lah duit. Buat beli tambang AirAsia ke Sarawak.
Kumpul cukup-cukup untuk makan minum juga.

Pergilah ke pendalaman Sarawak untuk perjalanan sekali seumur hidup. Anda tidak akan menyesal. Percayalah.

Aku telah menikmatinya.

Mandilah dengan air hujan. Basuh pakaian dengan air hujan. Memasak dengan air hujan. Basuh berak dengan air hujan.

Dan rasailah gigitan rengit diponggong kamu dikala kamu ke jamban.

Bahawa tiada gigitan nyamuk sebisa gigitan nyamuk rengit.

Dan tiada nikmat menggaru, senikmat menggaru gigitan rengit.

Boleh berdarah ponggong digaru beb!

Kah kah kah kah!!!

Sunday, November 11, 2012

What meaning has Hajj in the age of capitalism?

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Jahanzeb Hussain 05 November 2012

Hajj is one of the five pillars of Islam and is obligatory upon all those Muslims who are physically fit and financially endowed to make a journey to Makkah at least once in their lifetime. While I have never been able to see Hajj to be anything beyond a mere ritual, I am aware that this journey could be of a great deal of importance when it comes to the spirituality of a believer.

Every person has their own temperament and how Hajj might effect that temperament varies from person to person. Despite this, I still do not see Hajj as anything more than a ritual which is merely physical, or is at least treated as just a physical practice without any connection to the realm of spirituality or to a deeper understanding of self and existence.

Like every other Islamic pillar of faith, Hajj has also become a formality of the physical practice of religion and rests on no appreciation of religion beyond that. Thus, as I have witnessed in real life, you can wake up in the morning and go to your office which happens to be in some government ministry or service and demand bribes so that the paperwork which is submitted by some working person to have for example water connection to his house can move on. Then you can take an afternoon break and go for daily prayers. In fact, you might also be fasting during the month of Ramadan while you are busy with that work routine.

Such examples are abundant across the Muslim world where some of the most corrupt government officials also happen to be the most religious on surface. Their religiosity does not go any deeper than that – it stays on their face in the shape of beards, turbans, rosary, and a Quran on their office desks. What I meant to say about religious practices in Islam becoming nothing more than a physical ritual is precisely demonstrated by the above example: Corruption and much worse goes on and on, especially by some of the most pious looking people, because religion has no meaning beyond such thoughtless repetitive actions or outward demeanor.

In such a case, appearance of religiosity can go along perfectly well alongside every other sin that exists in the book, since the true meaning of the religion, its teachings and the reasons behind these rituals are not taken into account. This is not necessarily because religion is manipulated or is used as a token though this certainly is the case on many occasions. What is also true is that these people are not impostors and conscious of it; they honestly believe or have come to internalize that, as long as they can zealously perform daily prayers, fast during Ramazan or go to Hajj, their daily, yearly or lifelong sins can be forgiven respectively, regardless of what kind of actions their everyday life is made up of.

It is also natural to expect such behavior in a society where the moral and essential teachings of religion are dismissed because inwardness and personal transformation have no value since it is the outward actions that are looked at by a judgmental and voyeur society. Before one dies and appears before God to be judged, he or she has to constantly be judged and judge others in this lifetime based on outward actions and appearances. The equivalent of this in Western societies is charity: Even the most criminal of capitalist corporations have a charity foundation through which they transfer crumbs from their table to whom they otherwise ruthlessly exploit every passing second. Their belief is also the same – either honest or cynical – that occasional actions such as donating a few cents to the poor are redemptive. Similar to their Muslim counterparts, their daily practices and what they entail is looked over because structural requirements.

The Hajj has been debased in more ways than one. Historically, the Hajj was carried out by a handful of people every year and most of the pilgrims were Muslim notables, scholars, and politicians. The guardianship of the Kabah, historically, has belonged to a single tribe which allowed that tribe to attain a prime position of power in terms of politics and social standing, both locally and beyond. The right to host the pilgrims and the claim to the guardianship of the Kabah is lucrative in many domains and the struggle to the claim is a notion of power rather than love for the religion.

The importance of pilgrimage to Makkah and who controls the Kabah is something that goes back hundreds of years before the coming of Islam. After the death of the Prophet, the civil war that broke out between Muslims on the question of who was the succeed the Prophet had for its roots a conscious power struggle by the most powerful and rich clans of Omar and Usman in order to take control of the holiest site in Islam. Notwithstanding the transformative and egalitarian nature of Islam, Prophet Mohammad and his teachings were unable to change some of the fundamental features and impulses of the Arabian society, which continue to this day. What ensued after His death was a far cry from what he wanted Makkah to be – a sanctuary where one would even forgive the murderer of one’s father.

Modern Makkah also reflects some of the most egoistic and greedy traits of human life that the Prophet and his religion wanted to eliminate, especially in very house of Islam. Ever since the creation of Saudi Arabia in 1932 after the conquest of that land by Abdul-Aziz Ibn Saud, the holy sites of Islam have started to lose their cultural integrity and the Hajj has increasingly become a capitalist venture. Spirituality has gone out of the window to be replaced by consumerism. Every aspect of Hajj has become an opportunity to make money and to promote business and state hegemony. The class divide at the pilgrimage is also blatant. This circus takes place every year under the watchful eyes of the Saudi religious and political authorities, embodied by the satanic clock tower which hovers above the Kabah.

Saudi Arabia receives around 3 million pilgrims per year which brings billions of dollars in revenue for the Saudi state since pilgrims have to pay for services they receive at Hajj. The payment for these services such as tents, water, mattresses, air conditioning, and security has to be made prior to making the Hajj. By default, therefore, the access to Hajj becomes exclusive to those who have the ability to pay for these services.

It is reasonable to demand that these services should be made available for free or for a much lower cost so that lower income people can carry out the Hajj without putting themselves under undue financial pressure, especially when one takes into account the wealth the Saudi state already has thanks to petrol revenues. However, this is not the case. In fact, the cost of Hajj keeps increasing every year. One might react and say that it is understandable that Saudi Arabia demands money for Hajj given the sheer scale of the pilgrimage and logistical challenge it poses every year. But this claim can be easily countered when looking at another Islamic gathering which takes place in Karbala, Iraq every year. Chehlom or the Fortieth Day is marked by Shia Muslims in remembrance of Imam Hussain – the grandson of the Prophet and the son of Imam Ali – and his martyrdom.

While Saudi Arabia receives around 3 million people, Iraq hosted almost 18 million Shia pilgrims in 2009 in two days. Contrary to Saudi Arabia, Iraq does not demand payment for pilgrimage even though it is a war-torn country, while Saudi Arabia is the largest exporter of oil in the world. What this shows is that a decimated country like Iraq, which can hardly provide security for its own citizens, can stage one of the largest – if not the largest – human gathering in the world and provide them with free shelter and food, while a wealthy petro-state like Saudi Arabia feels that it is necessary to make money out of a religious obligation.

Unlike Iraq, Saudi Arabia has also placed quotas on each country and the maximum number of pilgrims they can send every year. There is an entire industry that has been created around Hajj as well. For example, Hajj is a tour which is organized by tour and holiday operators just as their regular tours and deals. There is no difference between a normal week-long holiday tour and the Hajj when it comes to the business logic behind it because capital reduces everything down to the same fine line. Similarly, advertisement companies also make large profits because such a gathering of people provides a perfect occasion to advertise your products and services.

Modern Hajj cannot be complete without shopping. The clock tower is not only a hotel but it also has a shopping mall, where the pious can quickly revert to their real state of being by spending money on Gucci, Prada, Swatch, and gold. The parallel existence of religious practice and every other debased worldly practice that I described earlier in the essay are present at the Hajj, too.

The Kabah is literally surrounded by dichotomous centers that embody gluttony, greed, exhibition and selfishness. A pilgrim is lurked by the constant presence of these things. Once inside the mosque that houses the Kabah, a pilgrim is continuously reminded, psychologically and by its physical presence, that there is another force out there which is more luring, fruitful and one which gives you immediate rewards. And once inside those centers such as five-star hotels and shopping malls, one is constantly reminded that purification and salvation is just a step away, and that it is OK to be such a social creature as long as forgiveness is right around the corner and one can always have access to it.

Spending enormous amounts of money on self-glorification and self-exhibition by buying luxury goods goes simultaneously with praising the Almighty, and that, too, in comfort: Those who can afford to pay thousands of dollars per night for a room in the clock tower can ensure for themselves utmost opulence. In fact, the clock tower advertisement sells its room as ‘Divine Stay.’ Before the pious reach heaven thanks to their Hajj, they might as well stay in God’s company while on earth. If to reach God in the afterlife is through Hajj, then it seems that to reach Him in this life is through money. The internet connection in these places is called ‘Holy Internet.’ Maybe it is a hotline to God. A part from the clock tower, the Kabah is surrounded by other five-star hotels, which shows that class differences are well and alive. So much for the much talked about Muslim solidarity. One thing, though, that has be stated is this: The meaning of Hajj is lost if you to the Makkah and stay in a five-star hotel.

The hideous clock tower represents a plague that has taken over Makkah. It represents capitalism and technology, which negates the traditional and cultural aspects on that city. The Saudi authorities are technocratic and rabid capitalists who also believe in the cult of technology as modernity and progress.

As a result, the historic remains of early Islam and of the Ottoman era have been completely razed. Makkah now looks like a city which belongs to a people who have no history, identity, and culture. All the buildings associated with the life of the Prophet have been destroyed. The house of Hazrat Khadija who was the first wife of the Prophet was destroyed, only to be replaced by a block of … toilets.

The house of Hazrat Abu Bakr who was the first Caliph was also destroyed; the Hilton hotel stands over it today. In early 2002, a few hundred feet from the Abdul Aziz gate, King Fahd demolished an ochre-colored Ottoman fortress that had been built in 1781 on Mt. Bulbul, one of the five hills that overlooked the Kabah, to guard Makkah from tribal raids. The dilapidated fortress was a modest presence that blended in with its natural surroundings. Its destruction soured relations between Saudi Arabia and Turkey.

M. Istemihan Talay, then the Turkish minister of culture, described it as “no different from the pulling down of the Buddha monuments in Afghanistan.” The last vestiges of the Ottoman history are also being decimated, while in Madinah the tomb of Imam Hasan, Imam Ali and Hazrat Fatima was destroyed in 1925. There is a McDonald’s and Burger King near the Kabah and the same neon lights that light up strip clubs and casinos in Las Vegas light up the ‘Allahu Akbar’ sign on the clock tower. The construction around the Kabah is still going on and the plan is to make Makkah a ‘smart city.’ What that means is that the expansion of the Kabah will be technologically determined. It would not be surprising that in the next 20 years the Kabah will resemble some sort of a space ship. It is also important to add that the contract for the construction has been given to the Saudi BinLaden Group

I already highlighted what I think are the reasons for the fiasco that the Hajj has become. What I would like to add to it is how the Saudis win the consent of Muslims for these projects and what gives them cultural hegemony. Muslim societies suffer from a low self-esteem, identity crisis and a inferiority complex vis-à-vis the West. In this context, when they see the development around the Hajj, they see it as advancement and an entry of Islam in the modern world side by side of the technologically advanced West. Sadly, they have a blind-spot which they opt to ignore because they need something to stick on it and believe in. They want to imitate the West in order to feel worthy. The price to pay for it is one’s own identity and Islam’s history. Secondly, the Saudis have a cultural hegemony since they are the guardians of the Kabah. As a result, it is common in places like Pakistan for example to believe that the Saudis are holy and perfect and that their version of Islam is the purest. The consequence of this belief is there to see.

Its accuracy is debated but the Prophet supposedly predicted that one of the signs of the end times will be when tall buildings are built around the Kabah and the time ticks down on it. The clock tower is that building. It perhaps is also the Dajal or the Anti-Christ who is said to have one eye only and is the most corrupted influence in the world. The clock tower is a supreme mark of capitalism, a system which also has one eye and one perspective: Money. 

 * The writer, a 22-year old student based in Vancouver, is the editor of Collateral Damage Magazine.

Saturday, November 10, 2012

Cikgu-cikgi Takde Masa Nak Maen

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KUALA LUMPUR: Persatuan Gerakan Kebangkitan Pendidik Kebangsaan (Pendidik) memohon agar Kementerian Pelajaran mengkaji semula pelaksanaan Pentaksiran Berasaskan Sekolah (PBS) yang mewujudkan tekanan kerja yang melampau di kalangan guru.

Presiden Pendidik Normala Sudirman berkata, terlalu banyak aduan yang diterima oleh Jawatankuasa Pendidik berhubung isu PBS malah ada yang menyifatkan guru dilayan seperti 'robot' dan hak serta masa rehat mereka dirampas.

Katanya, urusan dokumentasi, kerja- kerja perkeranian serta pemprosesan markah telah menjejaskan tumpuan dan perancangan rapi guru terhadap keberkesanan pengajaran dan pembelajaran, Sedangkan ia merupakan faktor penting dan penentu kejayaan pelaksanaan PBS.

"Guru terpaksa bersengkang mata dan bangun malam untuk ‘key in’ data hingga pukul 2- 3 pagi di rumah untuk mengurus sistem fail pelajar .Contohnya kalau ada 40 pelajar, maka begitulah jumlah fail yang menyebabkan guru- guru terbeban dengan ‘kerja- kerja perkeranian’.

"Ini menjejaskan tumpuan guru dalam pengajaran dan pembelajaran. Bagaimana pula dengan guru yang terpaksa mengajar dua atau tiga mata pelajaran sehingga terpaksa ‘key in’ data 120 orang pelajar?"tegasnya.

Katanya, hak dan masa rehat guru serta kebajikan warga pendidik perlu diambil perhatian oleh Kementerian Pelajaran Malaysia dalam pelaksanaan PBS ini supaya guru tidak dibebankan dengan urusan tugas- tugas perkeranian.

Dalam pelaksanaan PBS, katanya kelajuan internet adalah perkara paling penting dan segala masalah yang timbul berkitan akses capaian internet yang terganggu, menyebabkan urusan untuk proses dokumentasi penilaian untuk ‘key in' data tidak dapat dilakukan.

"Selagi akses capaian internet 1 Bestari Net yang menggantikan School Net di sekolah masih belum diatasi, maka tangguh dahulu PBS ini dan kaji semula pelaksanaannya," katanya ketika ditemui. Tambahan pula soalnya, bagaimana dengan nasib 800,000 pelajar dari Sekolah Agama Rakyat (SAR) yang tidak diberi kod untuk melaksanakan PBS ini?

"Apakah mereka dianggap telah terkeluar dari kerangka sisitem pendidikan negara? Bagaimana dengan nasib mereka pada masa hadapan?Seolah- olah kerajaan meminggirkan peranan mereka yang juga merupakan warganegara Malaysia," katanya. 

Justeru, beliau mencadangkan agar guru-guru diberi kursus peningkatan secara profesional dan kursus pemantapan secara terancang supaya pelaksanaan PBS dapat berjalan dengan lancar.

Remember Marco Materazzi?

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Marco Materazzi Sitting On The Zidane Headbutt Statue

Thursday, November 8, 2012

Kisah Seekor Budak Melayu Bangang

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Hummer yg berkat ialah Hummer yg terbakar dalam hutan Grik

Budak Melayu bangang seekor ini, sejak kecik disuap dengan sudu emas.

Inilah seekor budak Melayu bangang yg mungkin tak tahu dia keluar ikut lubang mana. Dalam bangangnya dia fikir dia istimewa. Dia merasakan dirinya keturunan yg turun dari kayangan. Bagi seekor budak Melayu bangang ini, 'membujur lalu, melintang aku bagi tau bapak aku'!

Walhal, dia muncul didunia ini sepertimana orang lain juga, yakni melalui benda 'selebar 2 jari, panjang 3 inci' ibunya.

Inilah dasar seekor budak Melayu bangang tak sedar diuntung. Seekor budak Melayu bangang yg tak reti basa susah.

Budak Melayu bangang seekor ini terkembang terkemut lubang hidungnya dapat memulas steering Hummer.

Inilah seekor budak Melayu bangang yg tidak mengambil peduli bahawa betapa majunya suku-sakat Michael Chia itu yg telah ada beribu-ribu dewan perniagaan.

Budak Melayu bangang ini tidak akan mengambil peduli bahawa suku-sakatnya sendiri yg cuma ada 'dewan orang ramai'. Itulah tempat bapaknya menabur auta dan menagih undi di kampung-kampung.

Dasar seekor budak Melayu bangang yg masih tak sedar-sedar bahawa bapaknya diangkat tinggi, berpangkat tinggi, berkuasa dan berduit itu adalah amanah petani, pekebun kecil, penoreh getah dan pesawah padi yg telah memberi undi.

Bangang sampai ke tulang sulbi.


Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Musim Melayu Mengawan Sudah Tiba

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Dek kerana anak lelakinya telah beroleh benda 'lebar 2 jari panjang 3 inci', si Ali berbelanja harimau dan kerajaan negeri Melaka juga dikerah sama-sama berbelanja harimau. Telah pun dicanangkan oleh syarikat air kencing setan terkemuka bahawa majlisnya memang ter'grand' di Malaysia.

Itu kisah si Ali anak beranak. Tapi kita rakyat marhaen, ada musim 'grand'. Kita menunggu musim tengkujuh Nov/Dis merangkap musim cuti panjang sekolah, kerana musim-musim ini ialah musim Melayu mengawan. Kenduri kahwin disana sini. Makan free.

Tiada ubi kentang sesedap ubi kentang didalam gulai kawah kenduri kahwin. Juga tiada telur rebus sesedap bunga telur yg dibawak balik oleh bapak aku dari kenduri kahwin. Nostalgia!

Dewasa ini aku dapati ubi kentang dan telur rebus itu tidak sesedap dahulu. Mungkin sebab tiada lagi semangat kerja gotong-royong mengerjakan kenduri. Semua telah tua, sombong dan tak larat manakala anak muda telah meninggalkan kampung. Tiada lagi tenaga kerja percuma. Upah saja syarikat katering.

Dewasa ini juga aku dapati trend bersanding atas pelamin umpama mempelai Hindu telah kembali popular. Lagi hebat lagi cantik lagi mahal! Kahkahkahkah! Inilah dia penangan benda 'lebar 2 jari panjang 3 inci'. Bergolok bergadai jual buah pinggang pun sanggup. Apa pun sanggup. Mamat tengah happy.

Seingat aku, musim mengawan/musim cuti sekolah juga selalunya PRU diadakan.

Habis, PRU13 kita ini nak diadakan dimusim mengawan mana?

Takkan la cuti sekolah Nov/Dis ini. Ini musim tengkujuh. Sejuk. Habis kecut telor UMNO. 

Cuti sekolah bulan 3 tahun depan kot.

Friday, November 2, 2012

Sindrom Fatol Barua

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Percayalah, dengan hanya menonton tv dirumah sahaja, kita boleh tahu kekuatan tulang belakang seseorang ilmuan agama. 

Para ilmuan agama yg tak pernah muncul atau jarang sangat muncul di kaca tv itulah yg kuat tegap tulang belakangnya dan berupaya mencari makan sendiri. Dia tak perlu menjual akhiratnya untuk hidup senang di dunia. Ilmuan semacam ini ada seciput dan semakin pupus.

Yang lembik dan bengkok tulang belakangnya itulah yg kerap muncul dikaca tv. Berceramah bercerita itu ini tentang agama. Hidup ingin disuap setiap hari. Nama ingin dijulang. Telor ingin digosok selalu. Hidupnya penuh glamour, muka selalu keluar tv. Sebesar cacing kerawit pun aku tak percaya ilmuan agama seperti ini tidak mengikut skrip.

Inilah yg dikatakan Sindrom Fatol Barua. Sindrom Fatol Barua menyerang ilmuan agama sebagaimana Sindrom Terkacip Batu yg menyerang ahli politik. 

Terkini, kita lihat bagaimana hebatnya sindrom ini menyerang ilmuan agama setelah seorang pelakon porno MCA berhujah mengenai hudud.

Memanglah amat celaka apabila orang bukan Islam cuba bijak-memandai mengenai hudud. Pelakon porno itu bernasib baik kerana ini Kuala Lumpur bukan Kabul. Jika tidak tengkuknya gerenti kena kerat.

Ralat sungguh apabila semua ilmuan agama yg makan gaji besar, berpangkat besar, yg mukan selalu keluar suratkhabar dan ada rancangan sendiri di tv, senyap tak berkutik!

Apa wirid ilmuan agama seperti ini gamaknya? Sampai biru-biru lidah jadi kelu. 

Mungkin wiridnya, "Amenoutusanmeloyamahafiraun, amenoutusanmeloyamahafiraun, amenoutusanmeloyamahafiraun!"




Thursday, November 1, 2012

Skim TAKDE TELOR

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Kartun dicedok dari FB Zunar Kartunis


Hancai-boncai bumi bertuah ini bukan kerana penjajah datang menjarah.

Sampai bila nak menyalahkan Portugis, Belanda, Jepun, England, George Soros atau pun Pak Man Telo? British dah berambus 55 tahun dulu. Tanah ini tanah merdeka yang boleh membawa diri sendiri.

Bukaklah bijik mata, bumi bertuah ini sebenarnya jadi hancai boncai kerana dijarah oleh UMNO/BN. 

Hancai-boncai ini bertambah teruk sebermula rejim Mahafiraun Mohazalim.

Gambar diatas menyimpulkan dengan jelas bahawa rejim Mahafiraun mengamalkan Skim Takde Hati Perut. Moto skim ini ialah, 'Membujur lalu, melintang kena ISA.'

Setelah 23 tahun menjarah, skim Mahafiraun digantikan dengan Skim Takde Otak. Satu Malaya kena tipu dengan skim ini yg disangkakan skim yg elok kerana 'kunun'nya dikepalai orang alim dan lebai-lebai. Skim ini dipanggil Skim Takde Otak bukan kerana kepala bananya tak berotak, tetapi kerana kepala bananya malas nak berfikir sendiri, suka tidoooor! Kahkahkah!!! Habis apa segala serah kepada anak menantu.

Kemudian datang Skim Takde Telor. Ini skim terbaru. Skim inilah yg paling merbahaya diantara tiga skim. Kerana ia menggabungkan semua sifat-sifat 3 skim diatas. Ia dilihat memang tak bertelor dan berotak, kerana selepas Batu Putih kena pau Tanjung Pagar pun kena pau jugak! Moto skim ini mirip skim Mahafiraun, 'Membujur lalu, melintang aku bawak pergi Port Dickson!' Kahkahkah!!!

Semua skim-skim diatas sifatnya sama sahaja. Kiblatnya kuasa dan duit. Anak-beranak, kaum-kerabat dan suku-sakat buntang terlentang duit bergantang-gantang.

Kepala bana skim-skim ini tidak layak hatta kedalam tong sampah sejarah sekali pun. Pun begitu, tidaklah sampai tahap mereka ini kita doakan rusuk kiri bertemu rusuk kanan didalam liang lahat yang sempit. Kan??

Saturday, October 27, 2012

The life, times and legacy of Malcolm X

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In 1995 out of curiosity, I bought a book on Malcolm X titled Malcolm X: As They Knew Him and I am a fan ever since.

Just like Che Guevara, he died young. Never to see the fruit of the struggle. 

Below is a link to an article on Malcolm X by Zainab Cheema of Crescent International which appeared in Harakahdaily recently. It is a good read as an eye-opener for those who does'nt have an inkling about who is this Brother Minister Malcolm.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Kerat Tengkuknya, Bersempena Raya Korban

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Mula-mula sekali, perlu diakur bahawa Majlis Syura lebih berpengalaman menangani isu sebegini. Setakat ini  tiada tindakan yg akan memalukan Ustaz Nasa Seketui telah diambil terhadapnya.

Try tanya Asang Ali, "Wassup doc?", "Utang dah bayar?", "Amacam Syabas?" kah kahkah....

Akan tetapi, people on the street like u and me, kita akan kata, "kerat je tengkuk dia". Buat apa disimpan. Baik kerat sekarang sementara dia masih bertengkuk. Semakin lama dibiar, semakin dia naik lemak kelemak. Besar batang pinang tengkuk dia nanti susah.

Mat Sabu pernah kalah pilihanraya. Pernah kalah bertanding jawatan dalam parti. Tapi sikit pun tidak merubah dirinya. Rambutnya masih disikat rapi belah tepi dan dari dulu sampai sekarang jarang sangat pakai kopiah putih. Mat Sabu juga tidak merajuk membawa diri meracau-racau itu tidak kena dan ini tidak betul.

Tak payah dibela orang yg baru merasa kalah sekali dah lari merajuk ke Mekah ini. Siap ada gambar duduk laga-laga lutut.


Takkanlah nak tunggu dia main laga-laga pusat baru nak kerat kot?

Akan tetapi, kembali ke perenggan pertama diatas.





Sunday, October 21, 2012

Musa Tilam Terbau-bau Tanah Kubur

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Species ini kita tak akan jumpa lagi selepas PRU13
Mengikut sumber-sumber yg tak boleh dipercayai langsung,  diperkatakan orang Musa Tilam ingin menyertai sebuah parti politik.

Musa Tilam sebelum pencen mencari makan sebagai orang yg berkuasa dan berpangkat besar. Tapi  sebenarnya Musa Tilam hanyalah seorang khadam yg buruk lagi hina. Musa Tilam ini sampai dia masuk kubur pun orang akan ingat betapa taatnya dia kepada Mahafiraun.  Dia akan diingat orang sebagai pengusung tilam. Dia juga akan diingat sampai bila-bila sebagai pakar mengesan bulu-bulu dan air lendir diatas sebuah tilam.

Apek yg meraung-raung, "Tilaaaaam.... tilaaaaaam" jual tilam itu pun jauh lebih mulia.

Isu ini telah berlegar-legar dialam maya seawal minggu lepas dan nampaknya makin lama makin kurang  diperkatakan. 

Musa Tilam juga diperkhabarkan oleh sumber yg amat diragui kesahehannya, memang dengan muka tak malu telah pun mengisi borang keahlian.

Dibawah ini diperturunkan sedikit sebanyak biodata Musa Tilam dalam borang tersebut.

Saya kuat sembahyang. 
Dahi saya dah lebam kerana kuat tekan sejadah. 
Lebam ini saya buat sendiri, serupalah macam Mat Nuar yg saya tuduh lebamkan matanya sendiri. 
Saya belajar buat lebam didahi ini dari seorang YB Zol Kolom.

Saya berketurunan baik-baik. 

Seorang saudara kandung saya bekas ahli politik. Beliau cari makan dengan cara jual tanah orang Melayu.
Seorang saudara kandung saya lagi satu pula mencari makan hasil main wayang Melayu.
Bapa kami pula seorang guru mencari makan dengan mengajar huruf jawi kepada orang Melayu.


Memang benarlah sekarang musim si anu dan si anu yg pernah berpangkat besar ingin menyertai parti bulan mengambang. Sudah jadi macam trend.

Ini dahi lebam nak tumbuh tanduk
Yang palatnya, kehadiran mereka ini secara tidak langsung menenggelamkan budi gurkha-gurkha parti yg berkerja keras menaikkan parti. Dapat bekas Pegawai Daerah, tukang pacak bendera jangan dilupakan.

Berbalik kepada isu Musa Tilam, gurkha-gurkha parti ingin bertanya;
kamu nak masuk parti kami melalui bahagian mana dahulu?
Bahagian tangan? 
Bahagian kaki? 
Bahagian lutut? 
Atau cuma nak masukkan bulu dulu?

Gurkha-gurkha parti juga ingin berpesan kepada Musa Tilam dan sapa-sapa lagi yg teringin mengisi borang;

Tak payahlah kalau dah terbau-bau tanah kubur baru nak isi borang!


Terry: My Best Friends Are ***king Black C**ts!

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Monday, October 15, 2012

HATI SENANG, BATANG TARA GOYANG

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Dasar penswastaan ialah ilham berahi Mahafiraun. Dasar ini diperkenalkan Dr Mahafiraun diseawal tempoh yg dia duduk lama  sangat diatas singgahsana.
Habis banyak benda Dr Mahafiraun swastakan. LLN dah jadi TNB. LPN jadi Bernas. JBA jadi SYABAS, PUAS dsb. Menurutnya penswataan akan menjimatkan kos pengurusan dan menambahkan produktiviti seterusnya menghasilkan produk yg berkualiti. Tapi kita ini telah dikencingkan terlalu lama oleh Mahafiraun untuk menyedari bahawa dasar penswstaan ini cuma indah khabar dari rupa.
Ku sangkakan Ziana Zain datang bergelek, rupa-rupanya anak badak datang menghempap. Bala!
Jelas sudah, dasar penswastaan hanya mengenyangkan anak beranak, kaum kerabat dan suku-sakat Mahafiraun.
Cuma sekolah rendah kebangsaan dan sekolah menengah kebangsaan belum sempat diswastakan oleh Dr Mahafiraun. Jika tidak, haru kita.
Termutakhir, sekonyong-konyong muncul Mukthar al BauKari ingin memiliki KTMB. Ya tuan-tuan, KTMB yg saban tahun bikin rugi itu, ingin dimiliki Mukhtar al Baukari. Bukan kecik-kecik anak punya cerita.(sini)
Jangan ingat al Baukari ingin membuat kerja amal dengan mengambil alih KTMB. Jangan fikir dibawah naungan al Baukari, tambang keretapi dari Ipoh ke Kuala Lumpur akan jadi RM2.50 pergi balik. Lanchow. Tapi fikir dan ingatlah, tanah KTMB ada berapa ribu hektar di atas semenanjung Tanah Melayu ini? Serupalah macam tanah Felda. Bukan bijik sawit, tapi tempat akar sawit mencengkam itu yang bernilai tak terhingga.
Aku lebih kagum Ramly Mokni (sini) pembuat daging burger. Maaf cakap, aku sikit haram sebesar cacing kerawit pun tidak kagum pada al Baukari. Mula-mula sekali dia ini bukannya orang Melayu. Tengok sekali imbas sudah tahu. Mata besar. Hidung tinggi. Kening tinggi. Dia ini juga stok banyak bulu punya, macam pak arablah! Al Baukari ini serupalah macam Mahafiraun, Ungku Aziz, Naina Merican, ketua pemuda UMNO P Pinang (ntah hapa ke namanya). Mereka ini bukannya Melayu!
Bagi aku, species al Baukari ini sikit tak tumpah seperti Vincen Tan, tauke Astro, Tiong Ley and the gang dan sebagainya. Rembat selagi boleh rembat. Nak naik jet, bagi tumpang jet. Nak ke Mekah, kasi package mahal. I scratch your back, you scratch mine. Wa tolong lu, lu tolong wa. 
Al Baukari telah menjadi al Baukari seperti sekarang hasil mesra bergeli-gelinya dengan UMNO. Sujud syukurlah al Baukari kepada UMNO yg telah mempermudahkan segala urusannya dan membuka kangkang lubang perniagaan seluas-luasnya untuk al Baukari. Nak gula dapat gula. Nak pejabat pos dapat pejabat pos. Nak beras dapat beras (sini).
Al Baukari maju kerana bakatnya pandai menggosok. Habis ketua-ketua digosoknya licin berkilat. Mahafiraun kena. Lah kena. Jib kena. Melimpah ruah rezeki al Baukari. Hasilnya, sudah sampai tahap kalau al Baukari demam tiga hari, harga gula boleh naik 2 kupang lagi tau?
Paling haramjadah, species macam al Baukari ini dan mana-mana species peniaga yg kiblatnya ringgit dan dollar, mereka meniaga atas angin. Haloba. Meniaga beli itu beli ini, kuasai syarikat itu syarikat ini, bukan pakai duit poket dia. Semua guna duit bank. Serupalah macam Glazer ambil alih Manchester United (sini). Pinjam. Berhutang berbilion-bilion. Untung habis membayar bunga.
Al Baukari mungkin tak tau sentimen Keretapi Tanah Melayu terhadap orang Melayu. KTM ialah khazanah orang Melayu. Orang Melayu cuma tinggal 3 benda, iaitu baju Melayu, butang baju Melayu dan Keretapi Tanah Melayu. Kah kah kah!!! Itu pun sekerat dah LK Yew sapu.
KTMB perlu dikekalkan sebagai hak awam seperti mana api letrik dan bekalan air. Ini ialah kemudahan asas untuk rakyat terbanyak. Ini tugas kerajaan menyediakan pengangkutan awam, bekalan api letrik dan bekalan air dengan kadar seminima mungkin. Bukan untuk membuat keuntungan tujuannya.
Sekiranya KTMB berjaya dikapor al Baukari, sudah tentulah modus operandinya berbeza. Baukari sudah tentu akan meminimumkan kos untuk memaksimumkan untung. Cara paling mudah meminimumkan kos ialah mengecilkan sumber manusia. Buang pekerja. Bukan buang pekerja perut boroi yg duduk dalam bilik bersama setiausaha  tetapi, pekerja bawahan. Kerana pekerja atasan berperut boroi dikatakan boleh buat kerja mengepam tayar keretapi tetapi, kuli macai like u and me akan terketar-ketar duduk bawah air-cond!
Paling dikhuatiri, KTMB akan jadi macam MAS. Setelah bertahun-tahun MAS dikeronyok sehabis lendir sampai setengah mampus, kerajaan ambik alih. Hutang piutang sekupang pun tak payah bayar.
Mukhtar al Baukari akan lepas tangan hidup senang lenang macam Tajudin, duit berkepuk-kepuk, siang malam boleh main golf. Siang main golf 18 lubang, malam main snooker 2 bola satu batang.
Hati manyak senang, batang tara goyang.

Pahang Patin Rocks! - by George Soros

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You got nice Pahang patin??
Kahkahkahkah!!!! 
Ini agaknya kenapa Soros hello Najib. (sini)
You got nice patin?

Saturday, October 6, 2012

The van Has Arrived!

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van Persie ‘on the way’ to United super-stardom“I think I’m on the way,” said an understated Robin van Persie after the striker bagged his sixth and seventh goals in a Manchester United against Romanians CFR Cluj on Tuesday night. Indeed, such has been the Dutchman’s immediate impact since a £24 million transfer from Arsenal during the summer that neither player, nor club, could have hoped for a better start to the striker’s time at Old Trafford.

Is Rio Ferdinand really too old?

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Rio Ferdinand was left out of England’s Euro 2012 squad for “footballing reasons” according to Roy Hodgson, although it is widely accepted that the England manager preferred John Terry and the two couldn’t be in the same squad following the Chelsea captain shouting “black cunt” at Rio’s brother. The fact Martin Kelly, who had struggled to get in the starting XI of the 8th best team in the country, got the nod ahead of Rio when injuries struck the squad, made Hodgson’s excuses about “footballing reasons” appear ridiculous.
 
Terry went to the Euros, although the FA decided to strip him of the captaincy. In hindsight, this was a good decision, given that the FA have since ruled that Terry did racially abuse Anton last season. The damage it would have done England’s reputation to have a captain who has been deemed guilty of racial abuse would have been huge. You could even argue that his inclusion in the squad at all hasn’t painted England in the best light.

Shit Lookalikes: Jonjo Shelvey & ‘Pale Man’ From Pan’s Labyrinth

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shelveySLAL

whoateallthepies

Thursday, October 4, 2012

Zambry Oh Zambry! Dey! Apppa Ney!!!

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Ohhh! நான் dikalungkan மலர்கள், அனைத்து பரபரப்பை.


நான் கருப்பு நான் ஏன் தெரியுமா, ஆனால் நல்ல நல்ல இருக்கும் ...
இனிப்பு கருப்பு. மேலும் அழகாக பார்வை.
Kahkahkah!

நீங்கள் ஏன் வேண்டாம் என்று அனைத்து உட்கார்ந்த தீர்ந்து?
அடி தளத்தை சுற்றி டையிங், அது ஒரு விஷயமே இல்லை?
மிக சத்தான உணவு வெற்றிலை இருக்கிறது?

நான் மட்டும் மலர்கள் dikalung.
Batu குகைகள் வகையான Najib போகிறது குறிப்பிட தேவையில்லை.
Macha சரி?


Gambar dicedok dari http://hjfawi.blogspot.com/

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Habis Telor-telor Naik Menyorok Bawah Halkum

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Kartun dicedok dari FB Zunar Kartunis Fan Club

Kawan sorang tu mengajak berlabon dalam dewan. 
Tegangkan urat sikit-sikit.
Dah huru-hara geng sebelah sana. 
Habis semua pakat lari nak masuk perut mak balik semula.
Kahkahkah!!!

Ini bukan lintang pukang lagi. Ini dah macam lintang puk*.
Tak cukup tanah..kahkahkah!!!
Habis semua kecut, habis semua scrotum naik menyorok bawah halkum.

Mana dia geng cium keris?
Mana semua panglima-panglima yg kata sanggup nak berhancur tulang belulang ni,
Mana panglima-panglima kita yg sanggup bermandi darah ni...

Kalau macam ini, toksah cerita tulang,
toksah cerita mandi darah lah.

Mandi junub pun tak sempat!
Kahkahkahkah!!!


Monday, October 1, 2012

Wiridnya, “Amenoutusanmalaysiamahafiraun, amenoutusanmalaysiamahafiraun, amenoutusanmalaysiamahafiraun”

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Ada sorang pak lebai. Namanya Kadir Jasin. Samada Kadir b Jasin atau Kadir dari Jasin, aku pun tak tau. Nama lebai ini memang gah di saentero alam kewartawanan Melayu kerana sudah entah berapa puluh hadiah dan gelaran telah dipulunnya.

Species pak lebai ini Satu Malaya sudah tau minat Mahafiraun, berkawan mesra bagai isi dan kuku dengan Umno dan sejak reti membaca hinggalah sekarang, membaca Utusan berita hairan, utusan utusan, berita hairan utusan,  mcm dah tak ada suratkhabar lain.

Kalau dah minat Mahafiraun, masakan suka kepada Anwar Ibrahim. Selagi Anwar hidup, selagi itulah tidur tak lena tak merasa berair liur basi.

Pak Lebai ini menulis blog. Blog Pak Lebai bernama The Scribe (bahasa Mat Saleh tuuu… ).

Baru-baru ini pak lebai menimbulkan 6 persoalan serius lagi berat, sekiranya PR menang pilihanraya ke-13.


1. Adakah DAP, sebagai parti induk PR kerana mempunyai bilangan kerusi paling banyak dalam Dewan Rakyat, sanggup menerima dasar Negara Islam dan Hukum Hudud Pas?

2. Adakah PAS sanggup, secara sahih menggugurkan idealisme Negara Islam dan Hukum Hudud demi memenuhi kehendak DAP dan PKR?

3. Adakah PKR yang berdiri di tengah-tengah antara DAP dan PAS cukup berpengaruh untuk memujuk Karpal Singh supaya menerima Negara Islam atau mempengaruhi Tok Guru Nik Abdul Aziz Nik Mat supaya menggugurkan janji Negara Islam dan Hudud?

4. Siapakah antara Nik Abdul Aziz dan Karpal yang lebih arif dan pintar mengenai Perlembagaan dan undang-undang kerana apa yang diidamkan oleh PAS dan ditentang oleh DAP itu membabitkan Perlembagaan?

5. Adakah Anwar Ibrahim sah menjadi Perdana Menteri sekiranya PR menang? dan;

6. Apakah dasar ekonomi yang akan PR laksanakan?

Sebenarnya pak lebai tak payah pecah kepala, beruban misai janggut memikirkan persoalan yang serius dan berat-berat. Pak lebai boleh duduk relax and steady. Umur dah lanjut.

Cuba pak lebai kemukakan persoalan yg mudah seperti dibawah;

7)  Sekiranya PR menang, siapakah/apakah yang akan ditangkap/dibalun dulu? Mahafiraun atau ular?

Slow sampai ketulang sulbi/tongkeng/coccyx.

Saturday, September 29, 2012

Malaysia's Budget and the Election

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Prime Minister Najib seeks to deliver the goodies to his core constituencies
Malaysian Prime Minister Najib Tun Razak is expected to table a national budget Friday that will be bulging with takeaways for prospective voters in an election that keeps receding into the future. 

It is likely to include relief for first-time homebuyers and some aid for senior citizens, as well as yet more benefits for civil servants, the great preponderance of whom are Malays, Najib’s core constituency, as well as some additional assistance for people in the kampungs, or rural Malay villages. It has been estimated that there are almost no Malay families without a family member either in the civil service or the military.

The election now appears likely to be pushed back to sometime after the Lunar New Year, which begins on Feb. 10. November is unlikely, analysts say, because roughly 30,000 prospective Malay voters will be in Mecca on the hajj. Najib also has said he won’t call elections because the opposition Pakatan Rakyat coalition has announced that it will not call its own in the states it controls. 

That apparently is because Selangor, the state surrounding the city of Kuala Lumpur, thought to be one of the opposition’s major strongholds, could be in play. The Bersih election reform NGO complains it’s because the Barisan Nasional, or ruling national coalition, has registered tens of thousands of suspicious new voters, some with scores living at the same address. The Barisan says it’s because Parti Keadilan Rakyat, which opposition leader Anwar Ibrahim heads, is badly organized and hasn’t been able to efficiently run the state government it won in 2008.

There may be truth in both claims. But in any case it probably means at least another five months of fevered politicking in a country increasingly exhausted, racially divided and tired of ceaseless maneuvering between the two forces.

The electioneering is taking place in a polarized and difficult political setting that law enforcement officials should be attempting to control and either can’t or don’t. There are growing instances of both opposition and Barisan Nasional partisans burning and stamping and urinating on the pictures of their opponents, in the Barisan’s case pictures of opposition leader Anwar Ibrahim and his partners from Parti Islam se-Malaysia, or PAS, Nik Aziz Nik Mat and Hadi Awang, and Lim Kit Siang and Lim Guan Eng from the Democratic Action Party. 

The respected Economist Corporate Network, the UK-based magazine’s global briefing service for business executives, in August predicted that the Barisan would be returned to power although its majority would be reduced again. In 2008, when the Barisan was returned to power with a dramatically diminished majority, it spelled the end of Abdullah Badawi’s political career.

Would a similar result spell the end of Najib’s political career as well? There has been long-standing speculation that Muhyiddin Yassin, appointed deputy prime minister when Najib took over in 2009, has long coveted the job, and any weakness on Najib’s part would let slip the dogs of internal politics. Last month, unknown people widely distributed posters in Johor and Penang states asking for Najib to step down and make way for Muhyiddin to be prime minister even before the elections are called. No one has taken responsibility for the posters. 

According to a poll taken between Sept. 1-16 poll by the University of Malaya Centre for the Study of Democracy and Politics, Najib’s popularity has fallen from 61 percent to a still-respectable 58 percent since April while that of the Barisan Nasional has fallen from 40 percent to 32 percent during the same period, although the opposition approval figures are far below either of them. 

UMNO continues to be hobbled by a long series of scandals and corruption eruptions. The government has sought to limit the damage not by going after those exposed by various entities as corrupt, but instead by seeking to neutralize and discredit the whistle-blowers. The Companies Commission has brought charges of money laundering against Suaram, the human rights NGO that has been the motive force behind the French investigation of bribery in the 2002 purchase of two submarines and the lease of a third. Cynthia Gabriel, the director of Suaram, was called in for questioning today on the charges.

The leaders of Bersih, the NGO that is demanding election reform, have been sued for RM117,000 for damage to a police car which was overturned in the aftermath of a reform rally in April. The government said the organizers of the rally didn’t adequately protect the police car—an interesting construct, since usually the police are there to protect the crowd.

The most recent to feel the government’s hot breath are Rafizi Ramli, the strategy chief for the opposition Parti Keadilan Rakyat, and Johan Mohamad, a former Public Bank clerk, for leaking explosive details of an equally embarrassing scandal involving Malaysia’s National Feedlot Corporation, controlled by the husband of Shahrizat Abdul Jalil, the head of the women’s wing of UMNO. The scandal became known as Cowgate, in which more than RM100 million from a government soft loan were allegedly squandered on personal trips, fancy cars, condominiums in Singapore and Kuala Lumpur and largely failed in its mission to establish an operation to slaughter tens of thousands of cattle annually following Islamic religious practices.

Chinese voters abandoned
The Barisan seems to have largely abandoned the Chinese vote. Political infighting and scandal have reduced the Malaysian Chinese Association to a shambles. Despite the fact that it remains in the Barisan, the MCA has lost most of its clout. As a result, the Barisan has largely written off the major cities where Chinese votes are concentrated, to concentrate on the kampungs in the belief that since ethnic Malays make up 60.3 percent of the population, they will deliver a national majority for the coalition. In 2008, about 45 per cent of Malays voted for opposition parties. The Chinese percentage of the population has shrunk to 22.9 percent from 45 percent in 1957, partly because of Chinese migration to Singapore, Australia and other countries, and partly because ethnic Malay fertility rates are 40 percent higher than those of ethnic Indians and 56 percent higher than Malay Chinese, whose total fertility rate at 1.8 live births per adult woman, has fallen below replacement.

That has put racial politics at the front and center of the campaign and made for periodic bouts of ugly rhetoric, particularly from the Malay supremacy NGO Perkasa, and its leader, Ibrahim Ali, who has made flame-throwing speeches that come close to inciting violence. The still influential former Prime Minister Mahathir Mohamad is the patron of Perkasa and has backed their inflammatory rhetoric publicly and in his blog. 

UMNO has also sought to exploit the presence of Parti Islam se-Malaysia in the opposition coalition over a long-standing provision in the conservative Islamic party’s platform to institute hudud, or Shariah law, which includes harsh punishment for certain crimes, including theft, adultery, alcohol consumption, fornication and apostasy. The allegations that PAS would institute hudud are designed to impel urban ethnic Malays, who tend to be more liberal, from voting for PAS. The party’s newly elected moderate leaders deny they have any intention of doing any such thing.

The racial and electoral tensions have had a negative effect on investment, with foreign direct investment, a crucial Najib goal, actually falling on an annual basis. Net FDI is forecast to be down 5.8 percent in US dollar terms in 2012. As a percentage of gross domestic product, net FDI is expected to be off by 1.9 percent for 2012. 

There have been reports that top Chinese businessmen have delayed investments until after the election because of concerns about the political climate. That situation continues despite protestations of confidence from the prime minister and UMNO cadres. One particularly alarmist contact – an ethnic Malay businessman – said he and sizeable numbers of others, particularly Chinese ones, intend to book flights out of Kuala Lumpur after voting on the day the election is called because they fear a breakdown in law and order should it appear that the opposition is close to gaining an edge in the 222-member lower house of Parliament

If there were actually to be a hung parliament, chaos could be expected in the Dewan Rakyat, or parliament. Intensive horse-trading would take place in which both sides would resort to pouring money to safeguard or secure the loyalty of the minority parties and lure members away from the other party. In particular, the Barisan-affiliated parties in Sabah and Sarawak are especially thought to be open to swapping sides. The chief ministers of both states have been implicated in massive – a word that is often overused, but in this case may be inadequate – corruption. 

In particular, Abdul Taib Mahmud, the long-serving chief minister of Sarawak, has been implicated in looting the state of billions of dollars from resource extraction and salting the money away in Swiss banks as well as Australian, British, Canadian and US real estate. In Sabah, records show that the chief minister Musa Aman, steered more than US$90 million from timber sales into a Zurich, Switzerland account. If Anwar is close to tipping the balance in the Pakatan Rakyat’s favour, a source said in KL, he will attempt to entice the two to change sides, partly through guarantees of immunity from prosecution and through an increased portion of the oil and other revenues on East Malaysia resources that are now collected by the federal government. The two states get 5 percent of the royalty but have lately been clamouring for up to 20 percent. 

Parti Keadilan remains riven with factions largely stemming from the frustrated opportunists who left UMNO in 2008 and 2009 to join Anwar for a new avenue to power. Anwar continues to be constantly harried by lawsuits and attacks. But at the same time he appears to be manoeuvring deftly to keep the coalition ready for a projected election. 

A lot of money has been lost betting against UMNO. In the 1980s, the party was split among factions backing Musa Hitam, Tunku Razaleigh Hamzah and Mahathir. Going into the 1986 general elections, the party then as now was saddled by major controversy including the Bank Bumi scandal, in which the state-owned bank was forced to recapitalise after having lost US$1 billion through its Hong Kong-based subsidiary, Bumiputra Malaysia Finance. Mahathir himself had been exposed as the architect of a disastrous attempt to corner the tin market, which lost another US$500 million. The Cooperative Central Bank, established to help smallholders, was exposed as nearly insolvent because of nonperforming loans made to 19 UMNO politicians which had not been serviced in years. 

Nonetheless, when the dust settled in the wake of the election, the Barisan Nasional had won a clear and convincing victory and Mahathir was still in charge. UMNO in particular traditionally has had the nuts-and-bolts ability to use government services to get its voters to the polls. There are continuing – and credible – allegations that the Barisan has been registering large numbers of illegal aliens from Indonesia to pad the Malay vote. The party has also always been able to use its coffers to pay for the sandwiches, the buses, the polycarbonate for poverty-stricken voters’ roofs, the little bribes to its rural Malay constituents. There It retains that capability and it will use them. 

That doesn’t put Pakatan Rakyat out of the picture. Sources in the business community say that businessmen, either sensing an opportunity or covering their bets, are opening their wallets to the opposition, giving them for the first time the ability to play the same kind of Moneyball. The opposition won in five of Malaysia’s 13 states in 2008 and with the power of incumbency and ability to dish out projects and contracts, businessmen doing commerce in these states are more willing to open their wallets for the opposition parties this time around. 

On balance, it is inevitable to escape the conclusion that political instability will continue – until the election if the Barisan wins handily, and well afterward if it’s close as the jockeying for power continues on both sides. Over the next few months, politics as it is practiced in Kuala Lumpur will not be for the faint-hearted.